To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/09/16 01:53
Subject: [K-list] deesutra
From: Earth Angel
On 2004/09/16 01:53, Earth Angel posted thus to the K-list:
something like (bear with me...its tough to share this..easier to just
watch it cry itself out and leave the blessed sense of well-being in its
wake..but maybe someone out there can relate or knows why...what...)
something like.. "o I'm so alone and winter's coming and I've got $20
to my
name and no one lives out here..i'm really vulnerable...and so
tired...boo
hoo hoo. I need help, God..i really need someone to help me..."
that's as far as I can take it. since this kundalini I've not been
able
to do any of the things I used to do for money and nothing is in my
control.
I do psychic readings but not on the level that I used to do before
this, ie
running weekend workshops, teaching inner alchemy, leading meditation
groups
and body awareness etc.
Now I post a few flyers and run ads in the local alternative paper
and
people come when God sends them, by Grace and there's nothing I can do
about
it so the money thing is a place of total surrender. I live on
disability
payments, because, for working in the world, kundalini has disabled me.
my
doctor, a deep meditator has helped me get this 10 years ago.
In reply to deesutra...or in question to deesutra,
Is there nothing good that has come from your "K" experience? I'm asking
because I really believe that this should be, can be, a good thing. Do you
find that working with a massage therapist or an energy worker on a
consistent basis helps the "K" trial at all? Is there no one that will
trade skills with you. Have you found that when you make the changes and
releases your body is asking you to make that things seem to flow better?
I do see that everyone's "K" experience is different. Some people are more
healthy than they have ever been in their life. What is the key? What makes
that difference? Do some embrace the experience in a more loving way and
adjust and let go the material things in life more easily?
I'm really perplexed by the varied experiences. I have a friend that is
strong and healthy and thrives on the energy that is cursing through her
everyday and night. She lives for the experiences that she is involved in
during her sleep time. She feels there is no need for illness, unless we
choose that route. And often says to me when I feel awful that there is
something that I need to recognize, look at and release...and that I am
wallowing in "old" stuff. Is she one of the lucky ones? Or is there
something here all of us that are struggling with our "K" need to look at?
Do we need to embrace something that we are not embracing or is the
smoothness of the experience just based on the reality we have always
created in our life?
I honor your struggle, deesutra, I too spent many years ill, but it seems to
me now that I finally had to make a choice to LOVE life a little more, love
people a little more and learn to love ME a little more and things seemed to
progress easier for me.
I am not here to judge anyone, but to possibly understand what makes the
difference in peoples varied experiences. I want that JOY that we are all
meant to have.
Has anyone figured out the receipe?
FlyingWoman
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