To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/04/08 18:55
Subject: Re: [K-list] Anger and K
From: Ron Henshall
On 2003/04/08 18:55, Ron Henshall posted thus to the K-list:
Hi Janet et al,
I'm new to this list. I have been experiencing K for some 15 years or so,
in many forms but I will try to focus on the anger related aspects in this
message.
Some 10 years or so ago, my daughter, who was 17 at the time, was winding
me up as only a 17 year old can. :)
On this occasion I didn't want to take the bait, so I decided to leave the
situation before I blew up.
I went into my studio and thought that it might release some of the fire I
was feeling, if I played my didgeridoo. Within a very short time of me
starting to play, there was a loud 'crack' from the instrument. I paused for
a moment but then continued. Immediately there was another loud crack and
the didgeridoo spit down the length of it into two complete halves; much
like two pieces of guttering. I had the intuition that my anger and the
demise of the didgeridoo were connected, but I put it to the back of my
mind, settling that the cause of the problem was something to do with sudden
temperature changes.
Anyway, some time later I was doing a double (two clubs in one night) as a
multi-instrumental entertainer. I had done the first club and my music was
very warmly received by the audience there, so I left for the second club in
good spirits. When I arrived at the second venue, as I approached the stage
door and met the waiting compere, it was as if a huge black cloud had
descended on me.
I got into the dressing room and began to talk through my music with the
resident band. I soon figured that the source of the 'darkness' was the
keyboard player. It was as if he was a black hole or psychic vampire, he
made some sarcastic comment about one of the songs I was going to play and
so I blanked him and continued the 'talk through' with the rest of the band.
I became quite angry, but I determined that it wouldn't affect my
performance and that I would be 'professional' about it.
I got on stage and did my opening number on Tenor Sax. The next number had
me playing guitar and singing. At the end of this, I introduced the third
number( the Isley Brothers' 'This Old Heart O' Mine'), counted the band in
and, as they began playing the intro, took off my guitar, placed it on its
stand and picked up my Tenor Sax and clipped it onto the sling that was
around my neck. When I tried to blow the sax I realised that I couldn't
reach the mouthpiece with my lips. I thought that the sling must have
slipped and so I tightened it. Still I couldn't reach the mouthpiece. In
the end I had to lift the tenor so that my left hand was in front of my
face, and play the sax as if it was a bassoon.
>From where I was stood, the nearest person to me was the drummer and he was
some 6 feet away. I didn't know what had happened but the crook or top
joint of the instrument; the bit like a swan's neck, had bent down some 5
inches. I guessed that it must have been knocked but was confused because
there is a very strong brass support underneath it to prevent any bending.
When I took it to the menders, the technician told me he had never seen
anything like it. It appeared that there was no crease in the tubing as
would have been expected with such damage. It was, in his words, as if the
brass had just melted.
Sorry if I went around the houses, but for me, I have no doubts that in both
the above cases K had been blocked, anger had arisen and I had blown
something. Since then I have been very careful not to play a wind
instrument when I feel anger. Instead I find singing or intoning is a much
safer way to express any strong feelings.
I have noticed though that any sense of feeling hurt or dis-respected can
easily lead to increased k activity. If the small 'I' is not hogging the
limelight, then the energy seems to be much more balanced and open.
Thanks for letting me share this.
Love Ron
----- Original Message -----
From: "Janet Brockett" <yeshecho AT_NOSPAM mac.com>
To: <K-list AT_NOSPAM kundalini-gateway.org>
Sent: Tuesday, April 08, 2003 5:00 PM
Subject: [K-list] Anger and K
> Dear list
>
> Anger is a very energetic experience much like many K experiences.
>
> I have been having massive anger issues in the last couple of years.
Before that it was depression. To tell you the truth anger is a whole lot
better than depression despite what my buddhist teachers have told me. When
I am depressed my whole world stops and I wish to die for months and I am
worse than useless to everyone around me. When I am angry it come and goes
like a storm.
>
> Has anyone here has experienced an increase of anger with K movement?
>
> It just boils out of me and I am barely able to contain myself. Almost
like an anger Kriya.
>
>
> I know it is about not wanting to accept what is. But I wonder if the
strength of it is related to K or just unresolved childhood stuff or both.
>
> Your thoughtful opinions and stories about your own anger issues and K
would be helpful.
>
>
>
> To get a reminder of your password, visit:
>
http://dactyl.affordablehost.com/mailman/listinfo/k-list_kundalini-gateway.o
rg #5link
>
To get a reminder of your password, visit:
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