To: K-list 
Recieved: 2003/02/14  22:00  
Subject: [K-list] k-list] Psychopomps (for ken again) 
From: Dean Robbins
  
On 2003/02/14  22:00, Dean Robbins posted thus to the K-list: 
  
 
Hi beautiful Ken, 
 
Thanks for replying to my email, may we continue: 
 
(snip) 
 
> >It is an interesting point you have raised....is the pure feeling, an 
expression of samadhi. Because I have also had this experience you have 
described. Is it just being, without doing? I know that words are inadequate 
to express this state, but can you explain this to me to help me? 
 
> You should take what I am about to say with a IMHO in front of it :) 
 
Namsaste Ken... 
 
After all, it is a rational interpretation of a subjective experience. 
So I can't offer any objective, scientific, experimental data to support 
these ideas. 
 
That's okay, I understand. 
 
> A few times, during deep meditation, I've experienced what coincides 
with the description of samadhi by various yogis -- a loud roaring sound, a 
rush of blissful energy up my spine, and a sense of awareness that went 
beyond my physical body.  The experiences were overwhelming, and I couldn't 
maintain them for very long.  However, I was left with a feeling that what I 
really am is part of a universal field of pure awareness. 
 
I have had similar experiences and can identify with what you're saying. -- 
During a few meditations, I once lossed my sense of individuality (or sense 
of ego). It desolved and fell away 
for a few moments. It was a very profound experience. During that brief 
moment I was aware of what I would call the non- 
existence of "myself" ( if that makes sense). In its place, I experienced a 
total and utter freedom or abandonment. There was no thinking or conception 
of time and space.-- The whole experience did not register with my memory 
until I became aware of my physical presence.  Metaphorically, I felt as 
though an enormous weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. After the 
experience, I became acutely aware of my so-called "little" self and ego as 
a heavy burden; I realised it was a form of suffering in itself. This 
concerned me, as I felt 
that everybody was carrying around the same burden as myself... I felt so 
sad. 
 
> After a while, I started getting turned-off by all the bhakti 
(devotional) aspects of the yoga system I was in, and its emphasis on 
attaining the blissful samadhi state.  So, I found myself becoming 
re-interested in 
Zen Buddhism, which placed more of an emphasis on knowledge rather than 
feeling. It's not that I didn't like, even crave those states of 
bliss, but I was more inclined understand what it all meant.  I guess I 
started 
wondering what use samadhi was -- how did it help me understand and help 
save 
others from suffering. 
 
Do you think craving is intrinsic to bliss? I desire the same thing from my 
meditation. However, paradoxically, when I had 
the sense of ego or "self" drop away in meditation; there was no craving 
whatsoever. 
 
> What I believe now is that our simple awareness is what differentiatesus 
from inanimate objects -- that this awareness is our true nature --our 
essence.  There are many people who believe that computers will eventually 
become so sophisticated that they will achieve consciousness.  Yet I believe 
that no matter how complex they become, they will still just be blind 
processing machines. 
 
I Agree. How can inanimate objects ever be sentience? 
 
>They will not be truly aware of themselves or what they are doing.  These 
same people believe that consciousness is an emergent phenomeno produced by 
the brain alone. 
 
Imo, The brain cannot exist without consciousness. The brain would be inert 
matter. Without consciousness, it would be literally be, "brain" dead. 
 
>Yet I feel (based largely on these samadhi events) that our self is 
transcendental.  I don't think our ego lives after death, as it seems like 
an inner shell attached to the body, but  I think our true self, our 
awareness continues -- possibly forever. 
 
Yes, I agree that our Self is truly transcendent. My understanding of the 
ego is that it is purely a defense mechanism. Its sole purpose is to survive 
in this life; in and of itself, it is purely instrumental in protecting the 
physical animal. However, this instinct (ime) still continues to survive 
even after physical death until such time we realise that nothing can harm 
us anymore. This is when we come to know our true nature as immortal? I 
think then, that the ego dissolves naturally? -- Have you ever noticed how 
much small children are (with such beautiful innocence) totally unaware of 
danger. They  don't even understand the concept of pain and suffering until 
they come into contact with it. Could it be that their awareness is grounded 
in their pure (unsuffering) Nature? Could it be that they are "that" which 
only knows perfection before suffering.  Perhaps their "ego" is only born 
when they have a taste of suffering, and that for the rest of their lives 
they manifest ego to prevent further suffering. -- Interstesting question, 
yeah? 
 
Thanks for your time and energy Ken, you are much appreciated. 
 
with much love, 
 
Dean 
 
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