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To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/02/12 18:08
Subject: Re: [k-list] Charles' query.
From: Charles


On 2003/02/12 18:08, Charles posted thus to the K-list:

> Ok. Imagine yourself as a glass, and her as a
thirsty girl with a soda fountain.

:)) interesting analogy. In the car before I left her I
told her that it felt like I was a tub of Ben and
Jerrys and she was feasting greedily. Then when I put a
lid on the tub she got uncomfortable and started
stamping her feet.

> First thing she did, was drink you empty. That was
where the cold and shivers came from. I get the same
thing, when someone is feeding on my body's life energy
faster than it gets replaced, and sending me their
stuff so that my flow is blocked. Cold, dizzy, tired,
ungrounded and generally feeling like an old dishrag.

Yes, that was it.

> Cut your roots, so to speak... like a cut flower
placed into a jar of dye, that changes to the colour of
the dye. That may be why it took you longer to get
balanced again.

Not sure that I am yet and today had a horribly upset
stomach. I will continue to use the affirmations you
gave and Im sure I will be as good as new soon.

> I'm not going to tune in on her to find out, but I
can speculate.

My healer would say that she had picked up an Plaedian
implant and they were operating through her, the effect
being the same. He's got a thing about these ET
influences, I am not so sure but Im open to the
possibility. He says that they leave gateways open all
over your home if you let them breed without catching
them early. The vampire story resonates more for me.

> >and what i could / should have done or do about it.
> Her read on you was correct. You do tend to give
your power away. You have a bit of a sub streak. Hmm.
Feels like I need to explain that.

Now you tell me!! ;)) You know I was struggling to
understand which side of the fence I sit on. No wonder
I feel like your other half. LOL

>
>
>http://www.kundalini-gateway.org/klist/k1996/96229.htm

hmmm... this is very interesting.

> The types were so different, polarized yet
compatible. Even different words were interpreted
differently by the two types: for example, "challenge"
had a positive connotation to one type, and a fatiguing
reaction from the other.

Challenge has a fatiguing effect on me.


> We imagine nobility to be fine boned and the
peasants to be big boned. Labour and management.
Contrariwise, sometimes sub personalities make better
leaders, because "A leader is in service to the needs
of those they lead." Also, people do not always
identify with their genetic type. I have known fine
boned subs and big boned dominants. No generalizations
will hold up against the varieties of human
manifestation.

Well Im not big boned or fine boned... maybe leaning
slightly towards the big boned end. Im very physically
strong for my size although I think this is because I
harness and use energy effectively. Many people say
that I am a leader and I would agree that my leadership
skills are based on the traits you suggest above. I do
not lead aggressively though. My style is to lead by
example and unforcefully. Not sure Ive ever been
comfortable with pigeon holing myslef but if the cap
fits.........

> You want love, connection and approval and you
willingly open yourself empathically, and give power
away to get it.

Yeah but there is a point where I put my foot down. Im
discernning enough to not take too much shit fro
people.

> It is natural for you, and often pleasurable. The
question to ask yourself, is whether you are being
loving to yourself, when you do it? That is where the
discernment comes in, and it is easier when you know
yourself better.

Self sacrifice... hmmm. Yes maybe sometimes but what
the heck, my energy is abundant and before Friday I
thought... what harm can anyone do me anyway. I always
know where to draw the line instinctively. I just hope
my guidance/instincts continue to serve me well as they
have in the past. My life experience feels rich living
the way that I live. If not a bit hairy from time to
time.

> Keep using the two affirmations I gave you, a few
times a day

I will.. thank you :)

> In some places, like your healing work, it can be
effective to abandon yourself to the needs of your
client, be a conductor for their stuff, *if* it is as
Goddess Wills. In other places... well, you know...

I hear you.


> Recently, one of my favorite healers removed
thousands of "contracts" from me, where I had agreed to
take on people's stuff and process it. I was not aware
of the contracts, but there was something in me that
gave them a blank cheque. Fine boned me, karma crap
magnet-izer. People want to give me power and
responsibility... I do not always want to accept it! :)

You see, I get a lot of this too. In fact more and more
as time goes on. So I find it difficult to see which
category I fit into. And when I spent a few nights on
the S&M scene I found that I could relate to aspects of
both dom and sub. On reflection I think I lean towards
sub though not really sure.

> Part of the reason why she freaked when you went to
leave, is that she had been .. kind of, possessing you,
occupying your body, and you mirrored, locked her out,
and then left with her power stuck in you. Like,
kidnapping her soul.

Why do I always find these people? Its doesnt happen
often but none of my friends seem to have these
experiences and if it werent for this list I would feel
really lonely and misunderstood I reckon.

> I know you are receptive to me too, so perhaps you
heard my thought, or you did it yourself, in that way
or another. I wouldn't presume it was me. That would be
taking power/responsibility from you.

I dont really understand what you are saying here but I
agree I am very receptive to you. I feel a very close
connection and I appreciate you a great deal.


> It is a game. I do not understand why people play
football, either. :)

Now that I understand!!!

> She will think twice, before messing with someone
again. Good work!

Yeah its no biggie and Im grateful for the experience.
Thanks for your support. You're a star.
>
> Blessings!

Charles

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