To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/02/06 15:15
Subject: [k-list] Prayer
From: daniel tal
On 2003/02/06 15:15, daniel tal posted thus to the K-list:
Greetings from a semi-lurker.
Just need a place to write so someone out there knows where I am.
This is not a bitch. Woke up at 4 in the morning – have done this for the
past 4 days.
Stress can do many strange things to your body – for me its to produce a gas
so awful its comical – have never smelled anything like that before.
The past month has seen me, move to a new place, get sick twice from chronic
stomach problems (i.e. issue, stress, “k’, take your pick – really sevear
bed ridden pain for 3 days per attack), have to support my roommate who is
out of a job now for a year, worry about loosing my job, and have lost a
great friendship due to someone “re-discovering themselves’. I have
maintained a positive sense and outlook on all this and been “strong’.
Did not realize how bad I needed to just bawl (have not done that in so long
I don´t remember)
Woke up (again due to stress and no offense, stench (again kind of funny))
and felt
What I would call God around me. Yeah I´d call it God, my friend, my father,
best friend, thing that gives me love.
I just got the Nag Hammadi Library (christen Gnostic bible translations) and
was “told’ to open it to page 264. Have not read the book yet, no idea what
to expect. Opened to that page and again was told to go to the middle of the
page and read this:
“But I have become afraid, before them, since they rule. For what will they
do? What will I be able to say? Or what word will I be able to say that I
may escape them’ (this made no sense to me, out of context)
but
The Lord said “ James, I praise your understanding and your fear. If you
continue to be distressed, do not be concerned for anything else except that
your redemption. For behold, I shall complete this destiny upon this earth
as I have said from the heavens. And I shall reveal to you your redemption’
This made me cry harder than I can remember. I felt love and a promise that
no matter what else is going on in my life, my place, my role and that
guidance will be to awaken to love, in this life, right now and that it all
has sense and purpose.
I cry as I write and am full of emotion. It has much meaning to me.
Needed to share and for others to know.
Peace and hugs
Daniel
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