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To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/10/27 09:52
Subject: Re: [K-list] Re: I am sorry
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent


On 2002/10/27 09:52, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:

At 04:16 AM 27/10/02, HSV & AAL wrote:

>Then came Her response to it. I felt like I was hit
>with a brick from the anger that accompanied it. I did
>not expect that! But I should have. I have at least
>spent some time in the world of D/s, and I learned a
>lot about myself during that time. One of those things
>was to never make presumptions on behalf of a Dom/me
>else lightning shall rain upon you.

I said I was not angry. Why do you not want to believe me?

    It certainly was not worth getting all worked up about. I did not even
respond till Joyce sent the lines and the other post "get behind me Satan",
at which point it seemed prudent to gently remind her of consensuality and
point out that the list shaktizap was setting her off. The lines were a
waste of bandwidth, off topic self serving drama. Silly, really. Not worth
getting upset about. My good mood is more important than a new member
getting giddy and acting out.

   I was swearing simply to underline how much I do not care about
swearing... swearing more than Joyce, so her little expletive was
diminished. Kind of a camaraderie thing. I do not need to be angry to use
swear words. Shit fuck damn piss hell bugger cunt asshole. Whoop de doo.

 Good heavens, if email was enough to set me off, I'd never have a
moment's peace! I get a few hundred emails, most days... You should SEE
some of the bizarre crap people send to my domin8rex.com website! LOL!! Not
the healing requests.... the folks who go off on their sexual repression,
or on a Dom being spiritual. Heh. I smile and add their IP address to a
file that blocks them from visiting again. Gives me great satisfaction, a
nice warm feeling in my power chakra to quietly shut the door on them.
heehee hee!

 Any anger you felt, is your own. Don't be projecting it onto me, I
don't want it. Keep it or surrender it, as you please. You want to hang
onto it, I guess. Cannot imagine why... (shrug) your drama.

>I think that I'm trying to defend Joyce by begging
>Mystress not to be angry. Seems such a childish thing
>to do. I'm sure Joyce doesn't need defending, and
>Mystress doesn't need me in her face over something
>that doesn't concern me. Okay, so why not just delete
>all this and not send it?

Yup and Hillary already posted saying how silly it is to get worked up
thinking someone needs defending. So you go off and do it anyway. Well...
whatever floats your boat... :)

>Because then wouldn't that
>be lying in a way... hiding the truth of this moment?
>I always strive to be honest with myself and others.

    If you really feel that way, then you would be dancing naked in the
streets because clothes hide the truth of your nakedness. There is purpose
in privacy.
    I think, the truth is you like the attention and the drama... you know
this kind of behavior is detrimental to your health, but you do it anyway.
Go figger...

>But I worry and fear for what they will think of me and
>say to me... but then I always worry about that. They
>may say it was ego and not truth... is it? I don't
>know, but they may know and I can't learn unless I make
>myself completely vulnerable to them and become willing
>to learn. Have faith and hit send....

    Your post is not vulnerable, it is aggressive. A manipulation game. You
project your own emotions onto me, then use that, and "honesty" as an
excuse to post to the list all about how you think I am this and that...
setting yourself up as some kind of martyr hero. I did not ask for your
submission. Joyce did not ask for your defense. Defending her is projecting
weakness and need onto her. Whom does it serve?

Blessings!

http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm

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