To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/08/01 16:02
Subject: Re: [K-list] SCARED
From: Gregor Gonnella
On 2002/08/01 16:02, Gregor Gonnella posted thus to the K-list:
Hi Gregor,
I can understand that you are scared and that all of this is overwhelming....
Considering the horror-stories: I think that when everything is going fine and easy (that also happens ;) or if one has found guidance, there is no need to write... It's just the people with difficulties whose stories are read.
Yes you just hear the horror stories and think you are going to go mad! When all of this happened to me, I also didn't know anything about Kundalini and it took time before I really understood that Kundalini was the energy of My Self and not an enemy.
I see. But the energy feels so alien at times. When the energy is roused I go from having no energy because of the CFS to having too much because of the K!
It took more time before I understood that with K. all hidden unconscious beliefs and feelings came up: the anger, the fear just to see them and to release them.
But this is a process and that takes time.
The first thing I had to learn is to really love and accept myself....
Yes I get that but I think my CFS makes me more emotionally vunerable. I have such a deep urge to meditate. But if I do I am in SO much pain for 24 hours. Why do I still have such an urge? I feel like I'm electucing myself if I do!
Last time you wrote about your acupuncture-session. Would you like to share why you went to this acupuncturist?
Is it because of the energy? Was this the first treatment?
I was because of the CFS and the energy problem. It wasn't my first treatment but the K was much more active in this one. All my enrgy just traveled upwards and out of my head! Is there someone in your environment who is able to be with you or are you alone all day?
Where do you live? I thought your email-address is from England, is that right?
(I'm from the Netherlands).
I have a med teacher on email, I should speak to him more
O yes, can you describe what you are feeling in your body?
Are you feeling energies 24hours a day or only now and then?
And where in your body?
Yes the energy is burning away at the base of my spine. It doesn't seem to be able to travel up my spine. I was told I had alot of problems with my base chakra, maybe its working on that. I can't meditate, if i do the energy goes craze and I find noises SO painful. Is there anyway I can "turn up the gas" without going overboard like I do with meditation or prayer? I read your first messages in which you wrote that your kundalini awoke about a year ago.
How have you dealt with it in the past?
Are you able to sleep?
Sometime if the energy is bad, the whinning in my head gets really loud and I have loads of thoughts (what is the sound in my head?). I take a sleeping tablet and it sends me off to sleep.
If you would like to write, do so, because it would help me to get a better picture of you
and maybe I am able to give some more appropriate answers or advice...
love,
Herma
----- Original Message -----
From: Gregor Gonnella
To: Kundalini-Gate ; Hilary ; Herma
Sent: Wednesday, July 31, 2002 11:41 PM
Subject: [K-list] SCARED Dear all I do not believe this process to be a good thing. In fact I'm scared of it and scared it will do me more damage. I already have Chronic Fatigue Syndrom as a result of the awakening. There are so many horror stories and so few nice tales. I believe I have woken a demon and I am scared of it.
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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