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To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/07/15 14:11
Subject: Re: [K-list] mental "illness": non-irritating approaches
From: Laura


On 2002/07/15 14:11, Laura posted thus to the K-list:

Hbarrett47ATnospamaol.com wrote:
>Hi Laura -- I'm a psychologist by training whose spontaneous >k-awakening
>set off psychological processes and mood-swings that my >conventional
>education did little to prepare me for...You are >basically saying that you
>need to assume responsibility for and fully >accept the cyclic nature that
>you are given at the moment, that there >is richness to be found there
>among the risks, that it is naturally a >female cycle as opposed to a
>patriarchically-induced one, and that no >one can know better than you what
>is best for your psyche.

Hi Holly,

thank you so so much for this reply, i too have been pursuing training as an
MFT in somatic psychotherapy, and at times like these (especially after a
trip to border psychology section, bleck), i tend to question my efficacy in
service choice as well as my choice to live honestly in my emotional givens,
nice to know of others who are awake(ening) going this route>I think this kind of self-acceptance is hard-won and, being scarcely >there
>myself, I, too, was disturbed by the El Collie post. El was >adamant about
>the presence of emotional and physical suffering during >spiritual
>transformation.your mirroring of my post and comments about your own response to El Collie
really helped me with some immediate self-acceptance and the comfort of
being understood, jeez louise i think that is what is most needed. hard not
to get into self-blame for the turbulence. even when you tell yourself not
to get into self-blame. i guess i just find the nihilistic episodes for
lack of a better expression just as real as my other states of being and
worthwhile in its expression, even if it hurts.
>I think those of us who know this to be true from experience must >learn
>how to create our own sanctuaries during the dangerous times. >We should
>be able to say to our loved ones that we are descending or >are alreadydown
>in the darkness and would they please keep an eye on >us or protect us from
>intruders or whatever we need. For me this >kind of non-resistance makes
>the dark days easier to weather -- I >already know that they will soon pass
>(so, too, alas, will the >bliss!).

yes yes, non-resistance and looking the beast in the eye without judgement.
self-acceptance here too, even if i cannot expunge it from my being, who's
to say, maybe eventually.

the sanctuary building, i think, is truly truly key, i guess it just takes
time, self-awarness and faith to develop this and i should have hope that it
is possible to have this sort of support, i still feel so tentative and
frighteningly fragile in the realm of supportive sanctuary. alas, room for
growth. guess i am constantly afraid of bothering folks or having them get
sick of me in this state or having them react fearfully to something that is
so stigmatized and turn their back on me when that will just add feul to the
danger fire which is the last thing i need at those times.

i wish you peace and ease in your journey
and loving support and comfort in your dark places

love,
laura



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