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To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/05/18 21:37
Subject: Re: [K-list] boundaries was MAs Comments on 993
From: marsha marsha


On 2002/05/18 21:37, marsha marsha posted thus to the K-list:

Laura, Mystress,

Your struggle is very familiar to me. I also struggle to be not just living
up to what others hope and expect to find in me. For myself, I think I am
able to give others that I choose, some of what they need from me, even if
it costs me something in the giving, because I have a position full of
blessings and richness, emotionally and spiritually. In other words, I have
much, I can give some without noticing it. My problems come in when I have
given more than I can afford. I have to remember that in order to have
something to give, I need to be continually renewing and replenishing myself
by seeking oneness with God. If I get too busy, I hurt myself AND I have
nothing left to give.
  All of my life, apparently, my heart chakra has been open. I have delt
with that in many ways, but the way that seems to work the best is to take
the same care of me/mine that I would of others. If I were to see others
putting up with crap that I was putting up with, and think that people were
taking advantage or they were using themselves up for no gain, then I give
myself the same advice on getting out of the situation that I would give
them if they were to ask.
  I don't always follow through on this, and I have at times paid for that,
but I at least like to be aware that I am fulfilling others needs and
desires, instead of blindly doing so unaware that I am spending me to buy
them. I think (my opinion) that anyone who is open to others really needs
to pick up some personal boundaries and learn how defend themselves in this
way. If you don't, you will give yourself away until there is nothing left.
  I learned this the hard way.
  I also think that you can be giving and open with some people and
situations and it only renews you, not depletes. That might be when their
perceptions and desires match your own.
  And Laura, you are very sweet and open, and I am very glad you were
willing to share of your experiences this way. Mystress, the same to you.

Love,
Marsha


>From: "Laura " <dafmobileATnospamhotmail.com>
>wrote

>what you said about sensitivity to projections strongly reverberated with
>me. lately i have been working on developing strong boundaries and
>groundedness to fortify so that i can protect myself from the constant
>chameleoning and then struggling to dig myself out of the mire of
>identification to simply arrive back at my own clarity of self.
>
>i don't even really know yet what i mean by good boundaries or how that
>would feel, tho i am trying to gently visualize
>
> >From: Mystress Angelique Serpent <mystressATnospamfire-serpent.com> wrote
> > I am
> >very sensitive to projections... if I am not mindful, I get caught in
>them.

>"If a tree wants to reach to the sky, its roots need to go to the very
>hell"
>Nietzsche



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