To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/05/14 15:25
Subject: [K-list] Liquorice all sorts - yummie!
From: Rich
On 2002/05/14 15:25, Rich posted thus to the K-list:
I know that I can never really know myself for I am never to be found..
I am never me.. I am constantly changing.. How can I ever really know
something that is not the same for as I observe myself I also change as
do my considerations just like particles randomly moving according to
Brownian motion. So isn't this really a paradox... a conundrum.. Isn't
to know thyself really to mean to fully move with change.. To not get
caught up for a millisecond by the flow and ebbs of the currents of
life... To stay outside of time.. Outside of identification. outside of
thought. free of the mind.
As I work to shift the eons of debris that I have let myself become
caught up in, slowly starts to emerge a newer freer being. A renewed
spirit. A wiser soul. One not so keen to allow themselves to become
snagged again so readily.
The first observation in this is that by attempting to not allow myself
to become snagged again there is a projection of this outcome happening.
Just as hope is a projection of the fear of the thing happening as well
as the preferred outcome. This is my ego (mind) still clinging on. it
can lead only to a none better long term position. So I must also let go
of my desire to not get caught up in things. Back to square one? Maybe..
I need to change my view (2nd observation).. The safest thing I can do
for myself is to let go of my ego. For as long as I continue to act
through it I continue to be trapped.. I continue to create a karmic
backwash for myself.. Even the most subtle miniscule things will stir up
the ripple-less pond of life that I experience when my ego is no longer.
a projection of control or grasping will only produce a response of this
back from life no matter how much I try to pretend it won't.
The 3rd observation is that as letting go becomes easier and karma
starts to dissipate more. Everything starts to speed up.. Is it good or
bad. I should not judge. everything gets faster and faster as I spend
more time outside ... The gap between cause and effect seem to continue
to narrow.. Sometimes almost immediate.
My only salvation is to stay in spirit. Wisdom of the moment.. No hope,
nor no fear of any specific outcome.. Let spirit be the guide and never
further waves to become caught within.. This is my only wisdom . knowing
the manifestations of actions.
So my final observation is that becoming closer to living more out of
spirit leads to a very fine line of what can stifle me or not. Actions
have much greater strength than before. Power is granted to lift people
up and destroy them in a manner of speaking. It is how this power is
turned that is so vital to my own existence.
The difficulty is that there are still fragments of myself that believe
they are better off trying to settle old scores and win attention from
others. What is forgotten is that what is within me as divine power will
always be so much more than what the outer manifestations can give to
me.
Why oh why do I still play this crazy game .. Knowing I can never win
it.. Why oh why did I make it so hard for myself to find my own
centre.. Why oh why do I still not trust this within me to be my guide
always.. Why do I cling to my own stupid ego...
Answers on a postcard to ..... (or just hit reply..)
A Piece of blue sky.. I seek..
Rich
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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