To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/03/29 14:25
Subject: [K-list] Youth and K
From: isis robins-shaw
On 2002/03/29 14:25, isis robins-shaw posted thus to the K-list:
"Speaking as someone who has had a very very tough time with K, I'd say it's
largely to do with having a mature ego structure in place so you're more
able to remain intact while K does it's work. For me K kicked in at 16 so I
had the double whammy of the usual growing up shit/developing an ego in the
first place, plus K breaking it down and restructuring it at the same time!
I have no qualms in saying many would not have survived what I went through."
Kate, thanks a million for making that correlation. I can empathize with having the ego constantly destroyed and rebuilt before it's ever had a chance to exist firmly in the first place. I'm not sure when my K first started. I had horrible stomach pains from 16 on and have been on the spiritual- "who am I" path since at least 13. At 18 I spent my time studying Ayurveda, doing yoga (sloppily- I was quite a begginer!), meditating, and having crazy past life memories. I spent most of my time in my room while the rest of my household was going to college parties. About six months later I had to let go of those disciplines because I felt like I was delusional. Not only was I having frequent past life memories, but I was exploring the universe in my consciousness almost all the time. In my college classes I would look at people and see several of their lives at once. I felt overwhelmed, disoriented, and ungrounded. I felt the pain of what I thought was the earth, I felt my old pains, and I felt the pain of being alone in my experience. I also had amazing enlightenment experience where I touched a friend of mine, an Essene guru, and he said he had a K awakening. That was the first time I had ever heard the term. My 19th through 20th year was the most disorienting year I've had so far. During this year my range of possibility was so large I tried on everything from my teacher being a lizard creature, to "seeing" spirit creatures in my room. The people around me wanted to support me, but I ended up taking on a lot of their projections and isolating.
A month before my 20th brithday I graduated college and tried very hard to ground my energy. After a few months of working full time and living in a Cooperative house, I started feeling spacey and unbalanced. I would forget things instantaneously, hold different parts of my body and cry uncontrollably, have hot and cold flashes, remember past life things, etc. I went to a doctor because I could barely work and she didn't know what to do. After I met my husband, at 20, who is K active I started a different phase of clearing that included Kriyas and many other symptoms. That was when I started researching K and found that it was a perfect match to my experience.
I am very curious about K experience and age as well. I'd love to hear others experience. Is it easier when K starts when your ego is more intact? Hee hee what an adventure!
Isis
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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