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To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/10/12 06:37
Subject: [K-list] Re: Victimhood
From: Cleocatras

On 2001/10/12 06:37, Cleocatras posted thus to the K-list:

In a message dated 10/12/01 6:23:29 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
K-list writes:

>
> I agree Aaron.
>
> In a way I see forgiveness as a way of "getting real" and demythologizing
> things. What I've found is that when I have NOT forgiven someone I
continue
> to hurt myself for what "they" did. I take on the victim drama or a more
> aggressive one. What I can best do is give voice (to myself, if no one
else)
>
> to what my feelings are about the "incident" and what I would have rather
> they have done. It's important to get clear on my feelings and
expectations
> so

When a perpetrator victimizes his target the damage is the longterm claim to
victimhood. Its a disabling state of mind which continues to perpetuate the
original infliction. Some of the self talk to heal?

"Look what he did to me and it still continues! I am still a victim! He is
still victimizing me as long as I declare myself the victim. I realize this
is a personal choice to accept my victimhood and he is wallowing in bliss
that I continue to accept his infliction. Do I want him to be successful in
this predatory achievement? I am being devoured by this self appointed state
of mind. I bet he is just sitting around chucking about it, wallowing in his
power over me. I am owned by him and this energy until I let it go! Am I
going to let it continue? NO!!"

Cat


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