To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/05/09 07:42
Subject: Re: [K-list] To All .. Mirrors, Mirrors, Mirrors and 75 emails! (Nina)
From: Christopher Wynter

At 11:03 PM 9/05/01, you wrote:
>Christopher: Thanks for sharing, you roast, you. /smile/ What is your
>native language?

I never met my birth mother, but the language in the womb
was Polish, German and Yiddish ..

Consequently, learning to associate English words with emotional
responses from the body was difficult in early school years
because there was no resonance with the sounds ...

>Christopher, again: "If you can look on the other with compassion and see
>that's just the way the other is .. without any reaction on your
>part, then this aspect of the mirror does not necessarily apply."
>Interesting... I find that when I am truly engaged in the process of
>sharing "someone else's" state, that my mouth is not my own, it tends to
>blurt things out. Is this a reaction?

No ..

again I wrote somewhere .. the words come as an expression without
conscious thought framing the words .. I use the term response here
because of the spontaneity ..

Yes, we have been castigated as children for "blurting things out" ..

The reaction comes from thinking about what you have said and the
subsequent judgement .. where I define reaction as a re-enactment
of some past pattern or play.

>Perhaps an untrained awareness
>expressing itself.

yes .. the expression of awareness without preconditioning ..

after a while I learned to acknowledge these awarenesses firstly
to my self .. because what I needed to say was something the I needed to
hear .. only then am I free to express this to another .. and appropriateness
of the situation is the key here ..

>Example: sitting in the first session I had with a
>particular therapist, we were approaching the end of the introduction chat
>when I noticed that her left eye socket was turning purple and her eye was
>receding into her head.

Your energy had triggered an unconscious memory in her .. which was
her reaction ..

>Meanwhile, my left eye, the bones above it, and the
>space behind it felt as though a dagger had been plunged in and the whole
>area was being wrung out.

this was the projection .. or transference from her in reaction to the
unconsciously perceived threat ..

>She asked me if I had any questions and my mouth
>blurted: "No! But do -you- need to take a break?!"

That's fine ...

>She asked me how I knew
>(very quick of her, I was impressed... she caught me)...

no she didn't .. she was covering for her fear ..

>my response to
>that was equally automatic. Reaction or automatic response?

Ok Nina .. does this help ..

cw

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