To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/02/13 11:02
Subject: [K-list] The Injustice of being a Moon child
From: Chris Seidel
On 2001/02/13 11:02, Chris Seidel posted thus to the K-list:
Angelique Wrote:
Nobody decides how you will feel, but you.. and Goddess within you. As
soon as you blame someone else for how you feel, you are making them be God
for you.. giving your power away. The value in looking for perfection, is
to get out of victimhood and reclaim your own power.. so long as you are
holding onto attitudes of injustice you are clinging to victimhood.
Projecting victimhood onto others does not empower them, like seeing them
as Gods of their own lives will.
Thank you for that wonderfully stimulating discussion, both Vickie and
Angelique.
I much relate to the sentiments expressed on both sides -- but I have to
say my views now much more mirror Angelique's (at least in Theory -- maybe
not in practice).
From a slightly squewed perspective I could be considered a Minority in my
own right -- maybe not in my sex or ethnicity -- Western European white male
-- but in my own cultural upbringing within a religious culture which by the
status quo would be considered a cult. The fact that I was "born" into it
with a certain set of stigmas already attached to "Moonie" was a choice not
of my own making (or maybe it was when I incarnated -- and I just forgot).
For many years, I built up much resentment and disgust -- most of it
unconscious -- at how I could be manipulated, especially in the denial of my
own sexuality -- by a culture that was completely opposite of my true inner
nature. I really wanted to love sex and relish in the beauty and expression
of its manifestations of my own life -- but I gave my power away (maybe
rightfully so -- because physical threats were often linked with its
expression) to a group I had no intrinsic desire to follow or to find
commonality with.
That is why I feel such gratitude to people like Angelique (I feel like
i am kissing butt here but oh well) -- who have shown me that sexuality is
something sacred in and of itself, and it is we that attach the unneeded
stigmas and repulsion to it. Man, is it refreshing to hear. And I want to
hear more...
Perhaps the greatest beauty of my church was the prolongation of
youthful innocence and the idealism imbued into it. So beautiful were some
of the interactions and sharings of the "younger" days before the facade
began to crumble ...and along with it the innocence. It has been difficult
to let go of these memories of magical wonder ..and not looking for that
eternal innocence within my own soul...but that is something else.
In any case, it was ultimately not my church that made me do what I
did - accept a certain set of "moral", religious and philosophical codes
that were not truthfully my own -- but myself. The more I found myself
blaming my culture, parents, peers, etc., (and I still do it- man I'm still
not over it -- it might be awhile) -- the more I felt wracked on the inside
-- guilt having my sexuality that was totally fine in the first place and
guilt for repressing and not doing what my true inner self whispered to me,
but my dumb ears didn't want to hear.
It was only through this petrification process that I finally hit a
wall within where crisis was inevitable. I knew deep inside that it was
going to happen, but I was too ignorant to listen to MY TRUTH instead of the
truth given to me.
To get the truth from the outside was much easier than listening to it
from within. This is maybe true for others....
Coming to that place consciously, taking responsiblility for my own
thoughts and attitudes has been a challenge since my mind is so geared in
looking for blame in the attitudes of others.
It is empowering when you deep down say to yourself "Now what I do is
not because of them...but BECAUSE OF ME."
No longer do you squander your power to the whims and fancies of
other's ego, but begin on the ultimate journey delivering the consummate
homage to your true self.
I am not saying that I am perfect, and that I never give my power away
anymore (yeah right!!! You think I can change overnight -- well maybe I
can). But I realize when I do, and it is this empowerment that gives me the
strength to start living and looking from within.
Blessings to Everbody!!!
Celebrate every moment of life...for each is a sacred gift.
I pray for the healing of everyone on this list....may you all always be
blessed on your life's journey's and may this humble love reach to touch
your hearts....
thank you all for being...you are all so beautiful..
bye now,
Chris.
I suppose I could consider myself
DISCLAIMER!
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