To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/11/18 21:55
Subject: [K-list] Recent experience...comments please
From: Steve Kowalchuk
On 2000/11/18 21:55, Steve Kowalchuk posted thus to the K-list:
All,
I just re-subscribed to the list after a year-long hiatus. It's good to
be back. :)
I had an interesting thing happen about a month ago. Apparently, myself
and several of my friends went through a collective experience that has
since left us somehow changed. It was without question a spiritual
change, and in some ways really baffling, but let me explain some of the
symptoms.
It was different for each of us.
For myself, my kundalini experience had throughout my life left me
tremendously lonely and isolated. I knew what was going on, but efforts
to make this experience more distinct and real were spotty at best. My
training in the sciences left me alternating between exhilaration and
despondence. I'm sure you all know the drill, right? One day you're
crystal clear and calm. The next you're a 50 cent cab ride from the
booby hatch. And of course, this has its cycles as well.
I'd gotten used to it, and in my neck of the woods there aren't too many
folks with the same kind of experience, so one learns pretty quickly to
keep his mouth shut about energy and kriyas and meditation and chakras
and stuff. So I'd gotten used to sending psychic sonar pings out into
the world around me and hearing nothing back except my own echoes.
I can't exactly pinpoint when things changed, but I went to visit a
friend of mine in Pittsburgh on Oct 21 and she mentioned to me that she
had a very strange experience a few weeks before where a higher-evolved
version of herself had basically walked into her body because it was
time to do some major work and she needed to be capable of standing the
stress. And when she mentioned it, I realized that on the same day
something strange happened to me.
The really horrible feeling of being alone, and the constant looking in
other people's eyes looking for that spark, and the constant echoes of
nothing....all that went away. I had been ignoring it deliberately for
quite a while, and I'd hardly noticed. But when I thought about it, the
loneliness was replaced with a very deep sense of calm.
My call was being answered. And I was so busy with life in general that
when the loneliness went away, I hadn't given it a thought.
I meditated several times on this topic, attempting to assess what had
happened. Thus far all I feel is this tremendous sense of peace and
essentially a "don't worry, everything is going the way it is supposed
to" message. As I type these words, I feel my crown open, my base
chakra grounding to the earth, and an energy conduit big enough to drive
a truck through opens in me. I feel each of my chakras open and clear,
starting in my spine and flooding through my hands and feet. My mind is
clear and at peace.
Now I have restarted my yoga practice in earnest, and begun tai chi and
chi kung exercises with my normal meditation. The amount of energy
flowing through me is steadily increasing. Very interesting.
I was wondering if this happened to anyone else lately, or if I just
happened to be part of the lucky group this time.
Thanks!
Steve
--*--
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Stephen Kowalchuk spkATnospamkowalchuk.org
Letting go does not mean you stop making decisions.
It means you stop fighting where the decisions lead you.
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