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To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/11/12 07:37
Subject: Re: [K-list] Quaking....Quivering
From: Kathy


On 2000/11/12 07:37, Kathy posted thus to the K-list:

Greetings all,
I've been on the list since last Spring, and have been primarily in
Lurk mode, a lot has happened this summer. I'd been dealing with
drug addiction and for several years had been trying to take care of it
myself, without success. Finally I went through Treatment, so much of my
focus has been on that....the intensity of my k experiences has been
shadowed by "Recovery"....Chicken or Egg thing....In August things started
heating up again K-wise, not much deep sleep, lots of energy flowing at
night, dreams, heat, intense heart beating, mental activity....emotional
clearing, like there was much work to be done.. Felt I was channeling more
energy in my work....blissful healing work.... My last three weeks have been
especially joyful and flowing. Things are manifesting quickly...I cleaned
up some past relationship details after not being in relationship or a year
and half, felt ready to explore it again then....a new beautiful man came
into my life....it's hard to know what is for sure influencing what is going
on,
though I am inclined that it is a part of the earth changes/group evolution
thing.

Last week, I started conscious "quaking" ....freaked a little, as i had
a really scary dream, woke myself up as i was trying to scream....
then curled into a ball feeling really afraid....doing it alone when
i didn't have too, not remembering i could ask for help and it would
be there.....then my body went into this quivering thing....i think
it has been going on when i've been sleeping....had some
in my dreams, though this time i was conscious....felt it....let it do it's
thing, i could have stopped it, it felt like i was supposed to surrender
and let move whatever....this continued for quite a while and then
collapsed into deep sleep, this occured several times this night and
morning and continues to some degree every night since....some
during day if I am meditating/ doing Reiki...very
interesting.....my head got a bit into it....i must have MS or some seizure
disorder.....right....my brain is so beautiful!!! I feel it a part of K
energy releasing blockages, it doesn't feel like a fear response.
As of the start of conscious quivering.....my emotions are ranging
all over, more of the "low" end.....a mixture of sad,
confused, angry, solituding...foggy....the earth is shifting....my reality
is changing....can i surrender to it? I try...i do it a bit at a time....do
it differently....sometimes....learn and remember other times....it's
coming....the flow....trust...faith....

This last week also, I have been feeling so hungry & eating more....It is
good to hear your stories, your hope, your strength....how you are
integrating the energy/insights...etc....Please keep sharing.....I have
learned so much from your dialoguing and I am open
to any ideas/insights others have to assist me....I am not afraid of this
process...I welcome it, though always appreciate the wisdom of others that
may have walked this path before. One idea that was suggested, was that
when I am into intense quaking (would these be Kyrias?) and sleeping with my
friend, that he place one hand on my sacrum and the other on my crown to
stablize the energy....any ideas? He says he's not freaked by this, just
wonders if their is something he could do.....I do seem to do more intense
quaking when with him than alone.

Looking forward to your insights....Blessings, Kathy

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