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To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/09/20 14:28
Subject: [K-list] Awakening - Author Unknown
From: Dolores


On 2000/09/20 14:28, Dolores posted thus to the K-list:

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The Awakening

A time comes in your life when you finally get it . . . when in the
midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and
somewhere the voice inside your head cries out: ENOUGH! Enough
fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child
quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you
shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears, and through a
mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes.
This is your awakening.

You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something
to change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping
over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not
Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world
there aren't always fairytale endings (or beginnings for that matter)
and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you
and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance. You
awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone
will always love, appreciate, or approve of who or what you are . . .
and that's OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.)
And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and
in the process a sense of newfound confidence is born of self-
approval.

You stop bitching and blaming other people for the things they did to
you (or didn't do for you,) and you learn that the only thing you can
really count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don't always
say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will
always be there for you and that it's not always about you. So, you
learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself, and in the
process a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance. You
stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as
they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties, and
in the process a sense of peace & contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world
around you, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have
been ingrained into your psyche. You begin to sift through all the
crap you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should
look, how much you should weigh, what you should wear, where you
should shop, what you should drive, how and where you should live,
what you should do for a living, who you should sleep with, who you
should marry, what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of
having and raising children, or what you owe your parents.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And
you begin reassessing and redefining who you are what you really
stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing and
you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or
should never have bought into to begin with ,and in the process you
learn to go with your instincts. You learn that it is truly in giving
that we receive. And that there is power and glory in creating and
contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as
a "consumer" looking for your next fix. You learn that principles
such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a by
gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which
you must build a life.

You learn that you don't know everything, that it's not your job to
save the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to
distinguish between guilt and responsibility, and you learn the
importance of setting boundaries and of learning to say NO. You learn
that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that
martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love: Romantic love and familiar love. You learn
how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when
to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings
onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful,
more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man or
woman on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn to
look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have
them be. You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.
You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love.
And you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your
terms. And, you learn that alone does not mean lonely. And you look
in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be
a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the
image inside your head and agonizing over how you "stack up." You
also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing
things over, and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of
entitlement are perfectly OK, and you learn that it is your right to
want things and to ask for the things that you want--and that
sometimes it is necessary to make demands.

You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love,
kindness, sensitivity, and respect ,and you decide you won't settle
for less. And you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you
to glorify you with his or her touch . . . and in the process you
internalize the meaning of self-respect. And you learn that your body
really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and treat it with
respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water, and
taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the
spirit and can create doubt and fear. So you take more time to rest.
And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you
take more time to laugh and to play. You learn that for the most
part, in life, you get what you believe you deserve . . . and that
much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that
wishing for something to happen is different than working toward
making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to
achieve success you need direction, discipline, and perseverance. You
also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it's OK to risk
asking for help. You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is
the great robber baron of all time: FEAR itself. You learn to step
right into and through your fears, because you know that whatever
happens you can handle it and to give in to fear is to give away the
right to live life on your terms. And you learn to fight for your
life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.
You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you
think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to
unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to
personalize things. You learn that God isn't punishing you or failing
to answer your prayers. It's just life happening.

You learn to deal with evil in its most primal state: the ego. You
learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy, and resentment must
be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of
you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit
when you are wrong and to building bridges instead of walls.
You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple
things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the
earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water,
a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take
responsibility for yourself by yourself, and you make yourself a
promise never to betray yourself and never, ever to settle for less
than your heart's desire. And you hang a wind chime outside your
window so you can listen to the wind. And you make a point to keep
smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful
possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart, you take a deep breath and you
begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.


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