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To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/05/29 13:04
Subject: [K-list] The Power of Love
From: Ckress

On 2000/05/29 13:04, Ckress posted thus to the K-list:

As a follow-up to my last post, here are some quotes from "Love & Survival"
by Dean Ornish -- I highly recommend this book. Unless otherwise noted, all
the quotes are from Ornish.


"[In a study of 126 healthy men randomly chosen from Harvard classes of 1952
and 1954 given questionnaires to measure how they felt about their parents,
35 years later] 91 percent of participants who did not perceive themselves to
have had a warm relationship with their mothers thirty-five years earlier had
serious diagnosed diseases in midlife... as compared to 45 percent of those
who perceived themselves to have had a warm relationship with their mothers.
[82% had illnesses compared to 50% if they had a poor connection to the
father.] ALL (100 percent) of the participants who rated both their mothers
and fathers low in warmth and closeness thirty-five years earlier had
diseases diagnosed in midlife." p. 33

"The relationship of parental love and caring to future health was
independent of family history of illness, smoking, emotional stress,
subsequent death or divorce of parents, and the students' marital history."
p. 35

"... an intimate, loving relationship as an adult can offset many of the
harmful effects of childhood adversity and parental deprivation." p. 40

"Being loved is a kind of grace. It's not earned. It's just somebody
reflecting back that this little life we have, this single human being, makes
a difference in this world." -- Rachel Naomi Remen, p 205

"Surround yourself with people who have also decided they want to make an
open heart their path, their priority, their value. You don't want to keep
your heart open to somebody who's going to hurt you." p. 164

"...we still have a psychological development theory that defines what is
normal as making sure people are not dependent in their relationships. It
says that affiliation is pathological, that what you really need to be
healthy is not to need anybody." -- Psychologist James H. Billings, Ph.D.,
p. 225

"...a support group helps heal isolation, alienation, and loneliness. When
this happens, physical healing often follows, from the inside out." p. 119

"[Healing may not coincide with curing] Healing means that you are more at
ease, more at peace, that you have a sense of connection and connectedness
and a sense of being more in touch with your soul's purpose." p. 119

"... the way the spiritual dimension of relationships works is often by
creating almost a crucible that twists and turns and tugs you, and pulls you
into a higher level of consciousness. Maybe this is why relationship is
absolutely the sine qua non of that, because you would never do that to
yourself by yourself. You have to be in an intimate relationship to have the
kind of dynamic that's necessary to pull you into consciousness." -- Fetzer
Institute president Robert F. Lehman, p. 200-201

"Just listening to people generously strengthens them, because then they can
become more fully present. They are not trying to keep parts of themselves
out of the room. They can be there in one piece." -- Rachel Naomi Remen, p

"Paying attention to your emotions also can be a clue to what another person
is feeling. Hearts tend to resonate with each other... I was trained to pay
attention to what I felt when a person first entered the room as a clue to
what that patient might be experiencing." p. 109

"... speak from your heart, and whatever comes out will be holy. If they
reject you, then it's their loss." p. 167



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