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To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/05/16 15:58
Subject: Re: [K-list] Fwd: request
From: Paul Perner


On 2000/05/16 15:58, Paul Perner posted thus to the K-list:

Mystress Angelique Serpent wrote:

> Endorphins kicked in, that is what happens when you offer gratitude,
> instead of resistance. Goddess has it handled.
> Mythology is the key,
>

Indeed. Indeed it is.I remember also going through that strange, bad acid type
phase also and it's true, you do feel your body being flushed of all its defenses.
It's almost like you can look into a mirror and see yourself turn into a "zombie"
or one of the crack heads you see around town (I was a junkie ... no better). My
breaking through took a while, though, and only recently I've started to feel
those wonderful endorphin rushes. I once had one that felt so good it almost hurt.

 I wish I was aware of this community two years ago. The experience that is posted
on this list would have made the ride a lot smoother. But then again, if I knew
back then that my ravens and the horsewoman were part of a greater mythological
template, would I have the same inner goods that I now enjoy? Perhaps I had to get
bucked by the tiger. Perhaps the Goddess has to throw some of us thick-headed
types, kicking and screaming into the deep end to get results. I don't know ...
fate? destiny? providence? who knows? Fear is always a bad thing, but sometimes
being shocked and mystified into a new reality can be a good thing ... a VERY good
thing.

> I used to do the Ego Death ritual quite often, but it is powerful, and
> dangerous. So dangerous, that I do not teach it, and rarely speak of it, lest
> someone end up like you have. In ancient Greece, it was a death penalty,
> for an
> initiate of the Elysian Mysteries to speak of them, to a non-initiate. The
> ritual I do, is a modern version of those Mysteries... and initiates are
> requested to keep silence.
>

It took me a long time to understand why there are initiations and oaths in the
mystery traditions. It involves a certain getting from here to there process. B
just doesn't work unless you went through A. Also, some of the workings are of a
very personal nature and those out side the group might misunderstand. Like I
said, it took me a while to get over the suspicion that it was just some sort of
elitist, metaphysical in-crowd thing.
 There is one type that I don't quiet understand. I live with a female initiate of
the Golden Dawn who left them because she felt they weren't always being up front
with her (and they are very patriarchal), but to this day she can't talk about her
initiation. Not out of oath breaking ethical reasons, but because she LITERALLY
can't make her tongue and vocal chords react. Try as she might, she just can't
form the words. All she can tell me are a few trivial things about the beginning
of the rite and then she stammers...
 There's something in the Thelemic ceremonial system that doesn't sit well with
me. Crowley broke a lot of ground as scholar, but there's a short circuit
somewhere in the wiring of his complex books and from what I hear, if a
practitioner is caught in the danger zone ... that's it. There's no release.
  I'm learning that the Goddess does release and if some of those more industrial
strength energies could be used in transformation... WOW.

 I'm brand spankin' new on this list, but I'm now more convinced that Mystress A.
Serpent knows what she's doing and is The Witch With a Switch in more ways than
one. We should listen up before she has to use it ... in more ways than one.

 It's again been a pleasure.

  Love to all
   Paul Perner

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