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To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/03/15 06:37
Subject: [K-list] El apologizes for incendiary post
From: Ckress

On 2000/03/15 06:37, Ckress posted thus to the K-list:

From: ckressATnospamaol.com

Dear gang,

Sorry. A direct Saturn transit opposing my Mercury is probably no excuse to
anyone but astrologers on list. Truth is, I actually AGREE with one point
Christopher seemed to be making -- that trying to create certain conditions
polarizes us against the opposite conditions and thus keeps us spiritually
fragmented. It was the WAY in which he said it that triggered my psychotic

Also, I've never met anyone whose illness was the result of relentless
positive thinking -- or relentless fear of disease, for that matter. If
things worked that simply, there wouldn't be any hypochondriacs because their
fear of having illnesses would materialize as those very illnesses.

Being sick so much, I get fed up with people throwing out armchair judgments
about what makes people sick, especially if there is strong implication that
physical illness is the result of being personally or spiritually screwed up.
 I was extremely healthy for the first 43 years of my life, and I wasn't less
blocked or less/more of anything then than I am now. The only real
difference is that now I'm more experienced from both ends of the spectrum.
Does that make me more or less whole than someone who has experienced little
illness in their life? I don't see what good comes of these comparisons.
I'm just a human being bumbling along like everyone else, except right now
I'm bumbling in a more rabid sort of way.

Harsha recently complimented me on my tolerance of others. Hahahahaha.
Amazing how fast constant pain and very little sleep can fling tolerance out
the window. Grrrr grrrr bah humbug. Sorry I jumped all over you, Chris.
Just me venting. Not your fault.




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