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To: K-list
Recieved: 1999/06/01 07:17
Subject: Re: [K-list] my aching back
From: freda


On 1999/06/01 07:17, freda posted thus to the K-list:

Fellow K-sters,
Many have responded, with laughter, as well as sympathy for my befuddled
Thanksgiving meal...
I really ment it as a confirmation that physical aches and pains IMO can
indeed point to problems which have no physical basis...
for those who are responding with sadness for my pain, and my sorrows, I
thank you for being so sweet... however, I gotta tell ya, most of the
pain in my life has been self inflicted, and this was no exception...
The pain I suffered that day, had everything to do with my failures...
I failed to put a stop to the guest list, I failed to admit to my
limitations, its not like I couldnt have afforded to have this thing
catered, I failed to ask for help. I never spoke in these peoples'
presence about how their pettiness disturbed me.
I was mighty damn proud of that perfect lawn as well....
I spent months focusing 100% on poor little me, I focused on how
horrible it was GOING to be.
Martyrdom is a very good paying job, at least it was for me.
These people hadn't even knocked on the door yet and in my mind they had
already crucified me!!!
The people who were invited for a nice Thanksgiving Super and ended up
at the circus are the people who really deserve sympathy.
In truth, I loved family gatherings even with the nit-picking. I still
do, but I dont go unless MY head is on straight.
I make it to very few social gatherings these days : )
freda

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