To: K-list
Recieved: 1999/05/31 21:13
Subject: Re: [K-list] my aching back
From: freda
On 1999/05/31 21:13, freda posted thus to the K-list:
alingimp wrote:
>
> Dear Nancy,
> Pain in the
> upper back might be caused by lack of emotional support, feeling unloved,
> holding back love oneself. Does anything sound familiar?
I had the distinct pleasure (NoT) of being married to a man whos family
was terribly competitive towards each other they pitted themselves
against each other they measured themselves and each other nothing was
sacred, everything was scrutinized.. cars, houses, incomes, chldren, god
help me even their spouses! went on the block.. Much to my distress, my
family did the same... only they placed value on social graces, and at
gatherings they made it a point to recite each others flaws clear back
to infancy...
One year my husband got it in his craw to put on a massive Thanksgiving
Supper, only cause his sister had had a very successful Easter gathering
in her brand noe overpriced house... (really, who cares?) he invited
not only both families : ( but friends, and anyone who had no plans
that he could muster up in the months!! before HIS big event... picture
this .. the man bought new livingroom and dinningroom furniture, he paid
200 dollars to one of our gardeners to come Thanksgiving morning to make
sure not even one leaf was on his perfect lawn... and even had his car
detailed, just in case...
on the eve of this grand event the expected head count was pushing 80
... he went out for ciggeretts and didnt come right back... all night as
it would turn out... but,
It only took 2 hours from the time he left that I was in the emergency
room, my shoulderblades had pulled together, I could not move my arms,
as they dangled at my back, at least thats how it felt, my head was
pulled back so far I was looking behind me at the ceiling. My throat was
stretched so far that I could barely draw breath to my lungs. I rode to
the hospital in a cab, on my knees in the back seat floor cause its the
only way I would fit.
I have never enjoyed a Thanksgiving more fully than that one. I was
soooo happy from the seditives and painpills and muscle relaxers. I had
a blast, I had no inhibitions, no guilt either. I didnt care then, or
now that I failed beautifully each and every test.
I enjoyed it so much in fact that for a couple of years my neck went out
whenever I faced a stressful event. valium and darvon coctails, I swore
by them : 0
Nowdays, I dont have to go so far as to cripple myself to be able say
enough is enough.
A stiff neck and shoulders gets my attention,
I listen to my neck.
freda
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