1998/05/30 09:26
kundalini-l-d Digest V98 #417
kundalini-l-d Digest Volume 98 : Issue 417
Today's Topics:
Re: meat&sin&laughter & Gurus [ Mystress Angelique Serpent <serpent ]
vivid pictures/pain [ WEIVODAATnospamaol.com ]
Re: vivid pictures/pain (Never say N [ WEIVODAATnospamaol.com ]
Re: samskaras? PS - TeamK [ "Antoine" <acarreATnospamconcentric.net> ]
RE: Collision Detection [ "jb" <hc19436ATnospamautovia.com> ]
RE: samskaras? PS - TeamK [ "jb" <hc19436ATnospamautovia.com> ]
Re: Re: meat&sin&laughter & Gurus [ Hofe1ATnospamaol.com ]
K FUN-omena [ MMeyers541ATnospamaol.com ]
food allergies [ "Beth" <bethkATnospamband1.bandwidth.net> ]
Re: K FUN-omena [ valerie cooper <madammumATnospamptialaska. ]
the Itchy and Scratchy Show [ "Beth" <bethkATnospamband1.bandwidth.net> ]
vivid pictures [ "Beth" <bethkATnospamband1.bandwidth.net> ]
Re: Never say Never... [ "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <93035 ]
never turn your back on your crap [ jenny.hillATnospammail.utexas.edu (Jenny) ]
Re: Collision Detection & K [ "Brent Blalock" <blal0004ATnospammaroon.tc ]
Re: the Itchy and Scratchy Show [ Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com ]
Re: never turn your back on your cra [ Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com ]
subscribe [ Max Van Eys Creations <maxATnospamvaneys.d ]
Re: The Force of Self-Realization [ AfperryATnospamaol.com ]
Bodyless [ Paul West <paulATnospamstationone.demon.co ]
Re: The Force of Self-Realization [ Ann Morrison Fisher <annfisherATnospamstic ]
Re: never turn your back on your cra [ Ann Morrison Fisher <annfisherATnospamstic ]
RE: Violence/spanking (was RE: Unide [ amckeonATnospamhsmail.nfld.k12.mn.us ]
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 17:30:34 -0700
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent <serpentATnospamdomin8rex.com>
To: Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com
Cc: Hofe1ATnospamaol.com, lobsterATnospamdial.pipex.com, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: meat&sin&laughter & Gurus
Message-Id: <3.0.5.32.19980529173034.00954a90ATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
At 09:47 PM 28/05/98 EDT, Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com wrote:
>In a message dated 5/28/1998 5:33:59 PM Pacific Daylight Time, Hofe1ATnospamaol.com
>writes:
>
><< Dear Lobster:
>
> How should a Guru or Swami or whatever tell the student what he needs to
> hear? It's kind of a sensitive subject with me. There are some that
violently
> yell and scream at their students the "truth". >>
>
>Harsha: If someone has to yell and scream the "truth" they should not be
>posing as gurus. Lack of self - awareness is common among many so called
>spiritual teachers. Somehow or another their students will justify the
>abnormal behavior of the "teacher." The spectacle of blind leading the blind
>and confusing each other is both comical and sad.
>
Never say never.. I say a Guru who is too caught up in judging himself as
spiritual to yell when yelling is what the student needs, is too egoist to
be useful.
Sometimes in clearing negative issues, it is necessary to mimic the hurts
that created them in the first place.. so they come up and can be seen in
the clear light of discernment and released.
Not usually.. limitless manifestation often can come up with a better
way.. but the limited conceptions and needs of the student might insist on
harshness.
So I say: the Guru sez what the student needs to hear, in whatever way
the student is most likely to listen.
Blessings, A.
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 21:13:59 EDT
From: WEIVODAATnospamaol.com
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: vivid pictures/pain
Message-ID: <8fb1094f.356f5d58ATnospamaol.com>
I have a question, last night was very hard for me for many reason. All last
night I was seeing visions of my childhood, the pain, the suffering
everything. One thing though, the pictures were so vivid, I felt like I was
re-living all of it agin. I felt like I was being hit, kicked, raped, I could
feel my ribs breaking again. It was so really, I still am seeing some of the
pictures, but nothing like last night though. I also today really feel my
heart
charka. I do not understand what that was all about. Do you have any idea?
Love,
Kristin
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 21:26:30 EDT
From: WEIVODAATnospamaol.com
To: serpentATnospamdomin8rex.com, Kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: vivid pictures/pain (Never say Never)
Message-ID: <5bfa87f7.356f6047ATnospamaol.com>
In a message dated 98-05-29 20:59:22 EDT, you write:
>Yes. You misunderstood the message in the "Never say never" post.
>Your resistance to your parents will cause you pain, because there is
>only One of us and they are You. You try to reject them, it comes back, you
>go thru it again, so you can choose to feel differently. It is coming up so
>you can release the old pain and hurts, and heal them fully.
I understand, and very true. I will go back trough and choose to feel
differently.
>This time it is not real.. it is memory. Vivid, but memory. The heart
>wants you to love unconditionally.. so while these things are coming up,
>give love and forgiveness to your parents.
>Forgive them for everything, even while you are feeling the hurts all
>over again. They did the best they could, for what they knew and who they
>were. They could not help but love you, even if they were handicapped in
>being able to express it as you would have preferred.
>Your wanting them to be different, does not change that they were being
>he best they could be.
I am waiting for them to be different, but I know though that they will never
be different, and I cannot change it, or the past.
>Your anger and judgment and resistance to being like them.. does not hurt
>them. It hurts and limits you. It perpetuates the feelings of being abused.
>So it must come out, coz Goddess temple does not have such limiting ideas..
>and it comes out easy with surrender, or painful with resistance.
>Everything that happened, really was in your highest good, it all came to
>make you into the person you are, and the Goddess you are becoming. To make
>the strongest steel, takes the hottest fires and the hardest anvil.
>You are a good person, Kirsten. So they must have done something right,
>however accidentally..:)
They must have done something right, but I am not sure what. I am just going
to try and surrender to all of it, and go with the flow, and see where I end
up.
>You must hang on to the faith, that it all had a divine purpose that
>will eventually give you dividends of bliss such as you cannot imagine,
>now. Offer gratitude on faith, and give up your need to understand it. It
>will come clearer, in time.
>You are loved.
>The prince and pauper stories always have the prince getting humbled and
>hurt, so he can feel what bad leadership is, to be able to empathize enough
>with his subjects to be a good king.
>It is okay not to want to inflict the hurts you received on others, but
>you must give up judgment of those who hurt you, thus.. forgive them.
>I have told you, you have having experiences of being "christed".. how
>did he treat the people who hurt him? Follow that example.
> Blessings, M.
Yeah, I must give up the judgements of the people who have hurt me. I find it
hard to forgive them, but I guess that is the only choice I really have other
than not forgiving them. I have been trying harder each day to forgive them,
but its a hard one. I will fallow that example.
Love,
Kristin
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 21:47:39 -0400
From: "Antoine" <acarreATnospamconcentric.net>
To: <kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com>, "Danijel Turina" <sinisa.turinaATnospamzg.tel.hr>
Subject: Re: samskaras? PS - TeamK
Message-ID: <01bd8b6c$edb2f8a0$21f4adceATnospamconcentric>
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>>Harsha: No the crap is your own. To think it belongs to someone else is
the
>>fantasy of your ego.
>
>Danijel:No the crap is your own. To think it belongs to me is the fantasy
of your
>ego.
>Now which side of the mirror is the reality? ;)
None and all. thinking we can point *reality* makes me laught.
Danijel: Enough said. Yes, the crap you
>see on me is always yours, and if you ever get beyond it, you'll see that
>it is true.
Or it can be in both. At least if one is Reality all is in him no?
Playing with words
Antoine
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 03:41:04 +0100
From: "jb" <hc19436ATnospamautovia.com>
To: <kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com>
Subject: RE: Collision Detection
Message-ID: <000601bd8b74$64bb36e0$516335c3ATnospamjb>
Content-Type: text/plain;
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A graphics related, NIAO* IRQ caused another whoops without NMI? Sounds
like you are using an overclocked rom based bit-buster ...
happy gaming,
Jan
*Never In / Always Out buffer
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 03:41:11 +0100
From: "jb" <hc19436ATnospamautovia.com>
To: <melintonATnospamalison.sbc.edu>
Cc: <kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com>
Subject: RE: samskaras? PS - TeamK
Message-ID: <000801bd8b74$67f1a9c0$516335c3ATnospamjb>
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--Signalfire wrote:
> Danijel told me privately that he wasn't intered in my samskaras.
>
> What is it he's not interested in? I don't know this word.
>
> PS--KTeam:
> On the new K-site we *really* do need a glossary for folks. Who has enough
> sanskrit/hindi to do it?
You have, if you use one of the following online dictionaries :-)
The list is far from complete - there is much more.
Jan
http://www.gy.com/online/saol.htm
http://reality.sgi.com/atul_asd/sanskrit/dict/
http://www.jainworld.com/education/dictionary/
http://www.cs.colostate.edu/~malaiya/jaingloss.html
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 22:42:33 EDT
From: Hofe1ATnospamaol.com
To: serpentATnospamdomin8rex.com
Cc: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Re: meat&sin&laughter & Gurus
Message-ID: <ee5befe7.356f721aATnospamaol.com>
I think that verbal abuse used by a Guru to enlighten a student can be a
slippery slope. In addition the student tends to build a dependence upon his
Guru, which can be unhealthy, because there is no impetus toward developing
insight. As for a Guru being self realized and therefore held without account,
this is a purely subjective experience for most prospective students, because
the discernment is not there to judge this state. Many Gurus have amazing
powers and radiant charisma, but ultimately as a student I feel it is best to
learn and perfect one's technique and practice as one may gain from a Guru and
not be overly impressed by a Guru's radiance for ultimately that radiance is
that of heaven and earth. I prefer to practice detachment in such things.
Ultimately the Guru is the channel of light and not its source. As for myself,
I plead that I am only a neophyte in such matters and pray for the guidance
from my soul. Also there is the concept of lunar paths versus solar ones. More
on that later.
Best wishes,
Dave
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 00:54:50 EDT
From: MMeyers541ATnospamaol.com
To: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: K FUN-omena
Message-ID: <1bf3a1a2.356f911bATnospamaol.com>
Hi All,
Last week on the list ... prior to all these discussions of spanking/violence,
vegans versus carnivores, plutonium mining, people's MASSIVE EGOS, etc.,
etc....there was some talk about magical & mysterious k-phenomena such as
poltergeists & materializations of missing objects...
Which leads me to this VIQ (Very Important Question):
...WHAT IF... all the Elvis sightings occurring regularly around the country
REALLY ARE Elvis...entertaining us in "death" as in life??? --Michele
Enquiring minds want to know.
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 22:57:46 -0700
From: "Beth" <bethkATnospamband1.bandwidth.net>
To: <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: food allergies
Message-Id: <9805300555.AA19671ATnospamband1.bandwidth.net>
Are we still talking about this?
I have noticed that many of my symptoms are seasonal, and they only happen
here in the Pacific Northwest, not in Chicago. Accupuncture says its
because of damp versus dry. I get really frustrated with various
alternative health practitioners telling me that maybe I had nausea and
depression from eating broccoli because I had a bad expereince with
broccoli as a child, or that their method to "cure" all of my allergies
didn't work because of my traumatic childhood (which they never bothered to
ask about because it was obvious from my breathing patterns).
It has less to do with my childhood, my meridians, my yin and yang, my
breathing, etc., and more to do with genetic predisposition, immune
consequences of not being breastfed, several bouts with intestinal parasite
giardia. Very frustrating. Imagine life without pizza and chocolate.
but this has nothing to do with....
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 21:58:23 +0000
From: valerie cooper <madammumATnospamptialaska.net>
To: MMeyers541ATnospamaol.com
CC: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: Re: K FUN-omena
Message-ID: <356F2F66.506CATnospamptialaska.net>
Michele:
> ...WHAT IF... all the Elvis sightings occurring regularly around the country
> REALLY ARE Elvis...entertaining us in "death" as in life??? --Michele
>
> Enquiring minds want to know.
v: I think Elvis was cloned by the patrons of those guys who paint him
on all those black velvet wall hangings - maybe the Mexican Mafia, with
hefty payoffs by Graceland Estates Inc. & the church of Scientology, to
name just the tops of the pyramid...
Wonder who's gonna be the first to paint Micheal Jackson on black
velvet ??? We know they already have his DNA.
;-)
******
"Don't let worry kill you off--let the church help."
Valerie Cooper * http://geocities.com/SoHo/7982/
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 22:59:48 -0700
From: "Beth" <bethkATnospamband1.bandwidth.net>
To: <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: the Itchy and Scratchy Show
Message-Id: <9805300557.AA19717ATnospamband1.bandwidth.net>
a.k.a. Danijel and Harsha
(No! Harsha and Danijel!)
Very entertaining. Seriously. I mean it. You guys are great.
Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 23:07:22 -0700
From: "Beth" <bethkATnospamband1.bandwidth.net>
To: <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: vivid pictures
Message-Id: <9805300604.AA19851ATnospamband1.bandwidth.net>
I have also had the experiences of reliving childhood feelings during
meditation, just in small chunks. Some of it was good, but one day I
re-experienced the feelings of an embaressing practical joke played on me
at age 11. Believe me, this was not the worst expereince of my childhood,
but this was what came up. Why, I don't know. I had been wondering why in
the world I think everyone hates me. Is that one event the reason why?
That's pretty arbitrary. Sounds like the kind of decision an 11 year old
would make.
Maybe these old hurts and terrors come up when we are ready to feel,
digest, use, and excrete the energy they gave us long ago, that we have
been saving for this rainy day all these years. Or maybe it's just random.
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 01:49:36 -0500
From: "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <930359ATnospamaloe.ulima.edu.pe>
To: "Mystress Angelique Serpent" <serpentATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Cc: "Kundalini List" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: Never say Never...
Message-ID: <003c01bd8b97$2176d380$f7db11cfATnospamlgvnprotelsa>
Content-Type: text/plain;
charset="iso-8859-1"
-> Observing the kerfuffle lately, two things come to mind.. the first is
>resonant Mirror of all that is.. WE can only see in another, what is true
>of ourselves.. everything we say about another, we are speaking of
>ourselves.. everything outside is inside is outside..
Makes me remember the lyrics to a Beatle song "Everybody is got something to
hide except me and my monkey":
The Outside is in when the inside is out so come on!
> They insisted of the Titanic "Not even God can sink this ship".. So down
>she goes, on her maiden voyage. That's what happens when you say "never" to
>God. Bad idea.
Too much arrogance sunk the Titanic.
> Three cheers for differences of opinion.. without them I could not see my
>judgments, to balance their polarity into a middle path.
> Blessings, Mystress.
middle path, so hard to get there, not imposible task though (I hope).
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 03:39:51 -0500
From: jenny.hillATnospammail.utexas.edu (Jenny)
To: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: never turn your back on your crap
Message-Id: <v01530500b195733cfd44ATnospam[128.83.112.207]>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
>Date: Fri, 29 May 1998 19:55:54 +0200
>From: Danijel Turina <sinisa.turinaATnospamzg.tel.hr>
>To: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
>Subject: Re: samskaras? PS - TeamK
>>In a message dated 5/29/1998, 1:31:29 PM, sinisa.turinaATnospamzg.tel.hr writes:
>><<You see, while I hadn't finished cleansing my system, I had crap all over
>>me. So I never knew whether the crap I felt was mine or it belonged to the
>>others.>>
>>
>>Harsha: No the crap is your own. To think it belongs to someone else is the
>>fantasy of your ego.
>
>No the crap is your own. To think it belongs to me is the fantasy of your
>ego.
Hey... your both wrong... it's my crap and I want it back NOW!!
Dang, I was wondering all my crap disappeared to!
(wink)
*****************
the crap which can be spoken of is not the crap
*****************
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 04:22:33 -0500
From: "Brent Blalock" <blal0004ATnospammaroon.tc.umn.edu>
To: "Paul West" <paulATnospamstationone.demon.co.uk>
Cc: "Kundalini - L" <kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com>
Subject: Re: Collision Detection & K
Message-ID: <005501bd8bac$dbdef620$c9d65ea0ATnospammaroon.tc.umn.edu.tc.umn.eduumn.edu>
Content-Type: text/plain;
charset="iso-8859-1"
Looks like *somebody* is getting their mailing lists mixed up...
>> The main reason for doing it using a collision bitmap is for speed when
>> checking
>> for collisions against walls. Since I use this method there is no need to
>> have the
>> walls in a regular pattern. In fact I am thinking of making the levels
drawn
>> as a
>> collection of graphics objects placed at particular screen coordinates
>> rather
>> than my current grid based approach.
>
>I can see how that would be highly beneficial.
It is the ego who "sees" how that would be beneficial. If one wants to
escape the cycle of rebirths, one must see that "being beneficial" just
happens -- it is not done.
>> Since we are talking about this subject I have a question for everyone!
I
>> am using a 1-bitplane bitmap for collision detection and each of my
shapes
>> has to be blitted to the collision bitmap as well as the main bitmap. The
>> problem is that the main bitmap is 8 planes and I want to blit my 8 plane
>> shapes onto the 1 plane collision bitmap. However when I try to use
Blitmode
>> Solidmode and then blit to the collision bitmap of course I get the error
>> "Shape
>> has too many bitplanes". Does anyone know how I can blit the mask of an 8
>> plane shape on a 1 bitplane bitmap. I don't want to have to completely
>> rewrite my blitting routines! (Although if someone comes up with a good
>> new blitting library I might be tempted to use it instead :) )
>
>Ok. I take it that at some point you do a clearscreen on the
>1-bitplane bitmap. Instead of clearing it to 0, clear it to 1. Then
>use EraseMode. It should only require blitting of the object's
>cookiemask, a single bitplane. If it doesn't that's bad design by the
>blitz creators.
>
>Maybe you should have seperate shape objects that are 1-bitplane masks
>and use them for the collision detection. For example, in deluxe
>paint, load in your 8-plane iff resource, stencil all colours and draw
>a filled box over everything. Background colour should be locked. THen
>reduce screen format to 1 bitplane and save off to grab your
>mask-shapes.
>
>Alternatively, in blitz, use `ShapesBitmap' to make a dummy bitmap
>object of the shape, and then use `BitplanesBitmap' to select only the
>highest bitplane, and make sure that you only use palette colours 128
>to 255. Grab a shape from that bitmap and use it to blit 1-plane. Bit
>of a fudge mind you.
>
>I'll be supporting what you want to do in my library, ie
>single-bitplane blit-collision. But it wont be ready for a while yet.
I read a book by Ramakrishna that described a much better way of blitting
multi-faced objects. It's in his autobiography in the section entitled
"Kundalini and Blitting".
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 06:00:45 EDT
From: Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com
To: bethkATnospamband1.bandwidth.net, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: the Itchy and Scratchy Show
Message-ID: <4529f5e1.356fd8ceATnospamaol.com>
In a message dated 5/29/1998 10:57:34 PM Pacific Daylight Time,
bethkATnospamband1.bandwidth.net writes:
<< Harsha and Danijel!)
Very entertaining. Seriously. I mean it. You guys are great.
>>
Thanks. Although I am the major talent:--). Seriously, Dan was hired as an
extra at the last minute but is working out O.K. Has been whining and
complaining that he does not get enough fan mail. So I am sure your letter is
appreciated. Even better, send a check (to me and not Danny).
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 06:36:26 EDT
From: Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com
To: jenny.hillATnospammail.utexas.edu, kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: Re: never turn your back on your crap
Message-ID: <beb9c047.356fe12bATnospamaol.com>
In a message dated 5/30/1998 1:19:57 AM Pacific Daylight Time,
jenny.hillATnospammail.utexas.edu writes:
<< In a message dated 5/29/1998, 1:31:29 PM, sinisa.turinaATnospamzg.tel.hr writes:
>><<You see, while I hadn't finished cleansing my system, I had crap all over
>>me. So I never knew whether the crap I felt was mine or it belonged to the
>>others.>>
>> >>
Harsha: No the crap is your own. To think it belongs to someone else is the
>>fantasy of your ego.
Jenny: Hey... your both wrong... it's my crap and I want it back NOW!!
Dang, I was wondering all my crap disappeared to!
(wink)
Harsha: Sure Jenny. It is over at Danijel's house. He is building a swimming
pool with it. Evidently it helps him with his cleansing exercises:--).
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 12:50:56 +0200
From: Max Van Eys Creations <maxATnospamvaneys.demon.nl>
To: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: subscribe
Message-Id: <3.0.5.32.19980530125056.0079ce70ATnospampop3.demon.nl>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
subscribe
Peace to Your Journey, Love & Light to Your Paths
Max Van Eys Creations
Melkhoeve 34
NL-3992 XT Houten
tel. ++31(0)30 6379503
buzzer 06-59580074
Homepage http://www.vaneys.demon.nl
ICQ #9081859
email hotmail maxveysATnospamhotmail.com
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 07:44:32 EDT
From: AfperryATnospamaol.com
To: Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com
Cc: Kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: The Force of Self-Realization
Message-ID: <b2c02dda.356ff121ATnospamaol.com>
Dear Harsha,
In a message dated 29/5/98 6:00:33 pm, you wrote:
> Sri Krishna states in the Gita, "I am in the Heart of all beings....."
Alan: Indeed he does and I think this is one of the most poignant and
beautiful messages of the Gita/Mahabharata. I recall this in particular in
the context of Draupadi's humiliation at the court of the Kauravas, where she
called on Krishna but he took some time on coming to her aid. When she later
criticised him for this delay, he explained that she had not called on him as
"Resident in my Heart" (Hridayam?) until later on; had she done so initially,
Krishna would have been there in a trice instead of having to travel via
Dwaraka, etc.!! Lovely imagery........
This has a deep meaning for all of us but again I feel the story is figurative
as though to emphasise "I am resident in you", not separate, not far away up
above the clouds. I am your inmost Self. Don't search for me outside, look
within. And the use of the word 'heart' focuses us on experiential rather than
purely intellectual realization of God's presence, and also that loving is the
best way to experience it. As you know, this imagery is very common in the
Gita and is part of its timeless, universal appeal. I think that most of the
world's scriptures are symbolic or figurative, transmitting deep spiritual
truths in simple ways that can be understood by people at differing levels of
understanding. Sources of great joy and inspiration.
Not having experienced Nirvikalpa Samadhi, I cannot comment of the 'Heart Cave
' experience you had, but I have experienced the Blue Pearl in (and around!)
the head. How does this tie in with the Heart Cave?
>Harsha: Tonight I will look through some quotes in the Upanishads where the
>Heart is mentioned (as it is mentionequite often).
Alan: Katha 2. 3.17. (penultimate stanza) is the one I was referring to.
God bless,
Alan
Date: 30 May 98 14:45:32 +0000
From: Paul West <paulATnospamstationone.demon.co.uk>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Bodyless
Message-Id: <35701B8C.MD-0.196.paulATnospamstationone.demon.co.uk>
Hello.
Last night before going to bed, and before putting my pyjamas on, I
was sitting on the bed picking a small amount of dead skin from my
feet. I suddenly had this perception that it wasn't /my/ body anymore.
It was as though it was just a `thing'. I saw how quickly attatchment
returned and how it brought about the belief that this body is me. I
couldn't shake it after that, and didn't want to. It was something I
will see more again eventually.
I think this led me to have a strange dream in the night in which
I was in some clear blue water and held in my arms was an icon of male
bolidy perfection, tall, dark, muscular, beautiful. I kissed him, and
as I did this it seemed as though there was water inside of him. As
though his back was open and his insides were hollow. And he seemed to
drown more and more. And this is what I wanted. So I kissed him again,
and I could feel the water in his mouth. He was like someone on their
death bed, weak and lifeless. Finally there was a kiss of death and he
was no more.
--
Paul.
IRC: #amiga, Dalnet: #blitz
WWW: http://www.stationone.demon.co.uk
E-M: paulATnospamstationone.demon.co.uk
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 09:42:18 -0500
From: Ann Morrison Fisher <annfisherATnospamstic.net>
To: AfperryATnospamaol.com
Cc: Kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: The Force of Self-Realization
Message-Id: <l03010d07b195c84c48d6ATnospam[207.71.51.87]>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Hi Alan!
><snip> ...Lovely imagery........
>
>This has a deep meaning for all of us but again I feel the story is figurative
>as though to emphasise "I am resident in you", not separate, not far away up
>above the clouds. I am your inmost Self. Don't search for me outside, look
>within. And the use of the word 'heart' focuses us on experiential rather than
>purely intellectual realization of God's presence, and also that loving is the
>best way to experience it. As you know, this imagery is very common in the
>Gita and is part of its timeless, universal appeal. I think that most of the
>world's scriptures are symbolic or figurative, transmitting deep spiritual
>truths in simple ways that can be understood by people at differing levels of
>understanding. Sources of great joy and inspiration.
Yes. On the other hand, some lines speak of quite factual matters, methods
that are quite possible to use, etc. And they are often taken for "nothing
but" beautiful symbolism. For instance, the following lines speak of
withdrawing our attention from the physical senses:
"The tortoise can withdraw its legs;
"The seer can withdraw his senses."
Love,
Ann
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 09:42:38 -0500
From: Ann Morrison Fisher <annfisherATnospamstic.net>
To: jenny.hillATnospammail.utexas.edu (Jenny)
Cc: Kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: never turn your back on your crap
Message-Id: <l03010d08b195cb55ff9cATnospam[207.71.51.87]>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
>>>In a message dated 5/29/1998, 1:31:29 PM, sinisa.turinaATnospamzg.tel.hr writes:
>>><<You see, while I hadn't finished cleansing my system, I had crap all over
>>>me. So I never knew whether the crap I felt was mine or it belonged to the
>>>others.>>
>>>
>>>Harsha: No the crap is your own. To think it belongs to someone else is the
>>>fantasy of your ego.
>>
>>No the crap is your own. To think it belongs to me is the fantasy of your
>>ego.
>
>
>Jenny:
>Hey... your both wrong... it's my crap and I want it back NOW!!
>
>Dang, I was wondering all my crap disappeared to!
>
>(wink)
Ann:
Better watch out! You may get more back than you lost!! :))
>
>*****************
>
> the crap which can be spoken of is not the crap
>
>*****************
there are craps but the crap is uncharted
******************
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 11:16:29 -0500
From: amckeonATnospamhsmail.nfld.k12.mn.us
To: "jb" <hc19436ATnospamautovia.com>
Cc: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: RE: Violence/spanking (was RE: Unidentified subject!)
Message-Id: <l03020900b19598b7da2eATnospam[206.103.216.215]>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
>Jan:
>Dissociating from the body never happened. The pain was transformed into a
>perception without the "added value" of suffering. It didn't stop the
>feeling, but instead of victim I became observer. The event triggered my
>inventivity, so that it became impossible for my parents to punish me. Being
>locked up in a coal-shed, I blackened myself and my cloths. Being locked up
>in the toilet, I clogged the drain-pipe. Being locked up in the wardrobe, I
>removed buttons from cloths. My mother took over as the main educator and
>she reasoned things out with me instead of using physical violence.
You are an unusual human being. I am impressed by the creativity you showed
as a child in transforming your circumstances. I wish you had lived in my
neighborhood and we had been buddies. I would have learned many useful
survival skills. It must have given you a real feeling of empowerment and
mastery.
I was making observations in a general way that obviously do not apply to
you. This is reinforced by the fact that you show no anger at me for my
ignorant assumptions :)
Now I'll ask another question that is none of my business: How do you earn
a living? Someone like you must be doing something really fascinating. I am
curious since that is the biggest problem in my own life at the moment.
Thank you for your prompt response :)
amckeon
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