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1998/05/24 01:00
kundalini-l-d Digest V98 #399


kundalini-l-d Digest Volume 98 : Issue 399

Today's Topics:
  Re: Subconscious pressure and return [ David Bozzi <david.bozziATnospamsnet.net> ]
  Re: suffering [ David Bozzi <david.bozziATnospamsnet.net> ]
  Re: Scared/Help [ Kristin <KristinATnospamaol.com> ]
  Re: Scared/Help [ Kristin <KristinATnospamaol.com> ]
  Re: aura colours [ Am <heidiATnospamadan.kingston.net> ]
  Re: Scared/Help [ "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <93035 ]
  Re: Subconscious pressure and return [ "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <93035 ]
  Re: Guru? [ "Debora A. Orf" <dorf01ATnospammail.win.or ]
  The Force of Self-Realization [ Harsha1MTM <Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com> ]
  Re: Scared/Help [ Mystress Angelique Serpent <serpent ]
  Re: Subconscious pressure and return [ Mystress Angelique Serpent <serpent ]
  Re: Scared/Help [ Imtgxxx <ImtgxxxATnospamaol.com> ]
  Re: Scared/Help [ Kristin <KristinATnospamaol.com> ]
  Re: Subconscious pressure and return [ Roberto Gonzales del Valle <930359ATnospam ]
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 21:14:38 -0400
From: David Bozzi <david.bozziATnospamsnet.net>
To: Kundalini <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: Subconscious pressure and returning smiles
Message-ID: <3567747E.78CBATnospammail.snet.net>

Paul West wrote:

> I might smile at the person but I'm not
> exactly interested in how they take it. I seem more interested in
> making myself appear in a way that will not arouse offence in them.

I hate smiles...
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 21:20:18 -0400
From: David Bozzi <david.bozziATnospamsnet.net>
To: Kundalini <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: suffering
Message-ID: <356775D2.2018ATnospammail.snet.net>

Brent Blalock wrote:

> By definition, suffering isn't
> something that they would want.

Suffering comes in a flashy box.
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 21:37:34 EDT
From: Kristin <KristinATnospamaol.com>
To: ImtgxxxATnospamaol.com, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Scared/Help
Message-ID: <fe3cdb4e.356779e2ATnospamaol.com>

In a message dated 98-05-23 20:25:05 EDT, you write:

 1. What the cause of her depression is
 2. What she is going to do about it (I gave her various possibilities, as
well as many others here on the list - she is playing games - very sad power
games - she is unwell to need such a negative attention trip)
 3. How we can help
 4. Do you want to go around in this sad loop for the rest of your life >>

Okay, one, cause of my depression. Well, I am not totally sure, but this is
what I came up with, and so did my therapist. One is my past, my childhood, I
had a really hard childhood, and those memories have never left me. Then I am
right now trying to find myself, and who I am, cause I know I am not the
Kristin the skier, but I am trying to find Kristin, and everything I am
finding, are things that I always put behind me cause I was scared of the
feelings they might bring up. And look the feelings that I have been brought
up, are very painful, and has been very disturbing to me. I wish that I never
had to deal with them, but I guess it is time I do so. The next is my injury,
it has taken me away from what I love, and what I have always hidden my fears
and pain behind. I would go in to more detail, regarding this issue, but I do
not feel like sharing my whole life story with the list, some things do not
need to be shared with everyone.

I do not want to carry on with the way I am feeling its not me, and I do not
enjoy it at all. I have never been someone who shares my feelings openly, this
is all new to me. Finally this year, I opened up more with my friends, friends
who I thought were true friends. I scared them, because I was always the
person that they ran to with there problems, or a shoulder to cry on, what
ever the needed I did my best to offer. They would always say if Kristin can't
do it no one can. They always thought I was strong. Then finally I came out,
and I cried in front of them, showed them the way I was feeling, and so on. I
scared them, they never thought I would start crying one day in front of them.
So in the long run, I ended up losing many friends who I thought were true
friends, it hurt, but I also learned from it though. I have never been the one
who has been opened, but I thought maybe it will not hurt to finally open up,
and get support, but I don't know.

What I want, I am not really sure, like I said before, I am lost in my own
world, so I am trying to figure out what I need right now. Lets just say, I
need support, and some people to talk to you, I am not sure though, what I
really need right now.

To tell you the truth, I am kinda taken back right now. I am not to sure what
to say, and I do not want to say it wrong either. But here it goes, I never
understood, how people make judgements and comments on others when they do not
understand, or truly know the person. I must say though, it has to be hard,
when yo do not really know the whole story, and you are trying to help, I
would get frustrated, I just would never make a stab at person with out
understanding or knowing the person, so I am not going to get in to it with
you. You have the right to make what ever opinion about me that you would
like, and I am not going to go out of my way to make you change your mind,
because I need my all the energy I have right now to take care of myself. I
hope nothing I said above, came out the wrong way, I did not want it to in any
means.

Love,
Kristin
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 21:47:42 EDT
From: Kristin <KristinATnospamaol.com>
To: Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Scared/Help
Message-ID: <e2ba753.35677c3fATnospamaol.com>

Harsha: It makes perfect sense. I fully understand your search and your
dilemma. May I ask you Kristin how these symptoms came about? Do you feel
the medication you are taking for pain or any other drugs (recreational or
otherwise) you may have used could have done something to with making your
condition worse. Please answer if you wish to. Gloria lee gave good advice
when she suggested a complete physical by a medical doctor to rule out any
other problems. Do you think some type of therapeutic counseling would be
useful to you? Forgive me if I am being presumptuous. There is a light at
the end of the tunnel. One way or another you have to hang on. The best
healing is that of Satsangha (company of spiritual people). Many people are
praying for you.>>

The symptoms I do not think ever went away fully from my major depression last
year. It got better though, but that was also when I returned to my training
for skiing. I think I have kept some of everything that happened last year,
but I also think I am experienced other pain, that I have never felt before. I
stopped taking all my medication that I was taking for my knee, sometime back,
I did not like the feeling it gave my body, a drowsy, un-energized feeling.
Kristin
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 22:30:25 -0400
From: Am <heidiATnospamadan.kingston.net>
To: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: Re: aura colours
Message-Id: <199805240230.WAA18552ATnospamadan.kingston.net>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"

>It is possible to see auras without any chakra (other than root) being
>open, that was all that Vajra, Saraswati, etc. nadi stuff and their
>access to the brain centers that actually control the powers such as
>seeing auras. The best and most consistant viewers (can always do it)
>would be from people who've made it into throat (the psychic power
>chakra) or on up to the clairvoiant window in Ajna Chakra as well as
>the realized beings.
>Namaste,
>
>Joe

Ok, now I must put in my 2 cents. Purple (not necessarily smokey) I see ALL
the time with my eyes closed or open in the dark. Why? I wish to know,
finally. The electric blue used to be with me a few years ago and I rarely
see it now except occasionally as a dot in the middle of my inner screen
colours. The purple I see is usually alternating with emerald green every
few seconds. Any takers on that one?

And then there is ruby-red which I see once in a while. And ALWAYS, when
viewing my colours, there is a design criss-crossing through them like
hundreds of cracks. What is THAT? I've so far not come across a description
of a design within the colours, can anyone shed some light on this?

And something else yet. A golden grid of hexagons whithin which one to three
lines of blue outlined in red run through but, every night that I see this,
the blue line is on a different path. What shall I make of THIS? I plan to
draw this grid and copy it so that I can follow the blue line's changes and
see what comes out eventually.

Anyway, 'nuff said for now and I'm eagerly awaiting some finally needed
answers to these puzzles.

Thanks, list

Love in purple :)

Am
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 21:12:30 -0500
From: "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <930359ATnospamaloe.ulima.edu.pe>
To: "Kristin" <KristinATnospamaol.com>
Cc: "Kundalini List" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: Scared/Help
Message-ID: <00b701bd86bc$2bde3b40$c5db11cfATnospamlgvnprotelsa>
Content-Type: text/plain;
 charset="iso-8859-1"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit

>I Understand that everyone on the list does not know me as Kristin the ski
racer, but that is how I know myself. I do not know if I enjoy this
challenge,
>and I wish I was never faced with it, right now, I do not think I am ready
for
>a challenge this large. I feel like there is nothing left in me, no spark,
>nothing, I feel empty, and like I do not have anything. I question if I am
>losing myself, I feel like I am.

You are losing something that is not actually yourself. As I told you before
your essence will stay untouched and what is more important you will be in
touch with that essence. The source of joy and energy waiting for you in
there is never ending. What is happening to you now is also known as the
dark night of the soul which is a process when you get detached of your all
ego state to realize that -trascending ego- is the source, the real you.
You are dying in a way, but in a wonderful way. It is like the seed that has
to give it all to turn into a flower. Once the shell is broken your wings
will spread. But don´t be too hard on yourself.

A good person told me onetime that there are two powers: Faith and fear and
Faith is way stronger.

Remember we are all with you. But you got to become detached, not easy task.
No imposoble task either. For the alternative on not detachment is this pain
you don´t want anymore. Be able to give all away and new bright live awaits.
Nothing new under the sun, just be calmed knowing you are recieving love.

But just go with the flow. Don´t fight your own self, it is useless.

>I does not seem like this will ever end, like traveling in a tunnel, but
there
>is no light at the end of it.

Picture it as a bright light, inimaginable bright. Around it there is a tull
of blure that gets darker, until now it is inside you, when you close your
eyes.
Then it comes the outside world, mostly ilusion. It has bright appearence.

Well, Kristin, you are probably taking the journey to the light inside you
and going through the dusty part. Just know it, it is there and you will
eventually get a glimpse on the light and realize everything is just fine
there.
Peace is waiting for you. Just let yourself go towards it and don´t get
stuck fighting the dust.

I feel like I am searching for something I do
>not know, the scary part though is, I am searching for myself, and I am
>afraid, because I do not know myself, make any sense?

Of course, makes a lot of sense. At the center of it all there is not
yourself but self itself, the essence. No one knows it, a lot of people
experiences it, a glimpse of it is enough to bare a lifetime!

Bliss awaits at the turn of the corner. And yes, the road now is upwards but
you have got people watching for you not to fall.

Now, don´t be afraid, have faith, and go on. Meditate, take deep breaths and
realize you are breathing (breathe in, air goes downwards -- breathe out,
air goes upwards and out, very simple, very essential)

We are here for you, Kristin, a lot of us, if not all, have gone throuh a
similar
process. That is what this list is for: sharing, supporting, and sharing
again.

Lots of Love to you

Roberto
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 22:03:22 -0500
From: "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <930359ATnospamaloe.ulima.edu.pe>
To: "Kundalini List" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: Subconscious pressure and returning smiles
Message-ID: <011b01bd86c0$88a1f480$c5db11cfATnospamlgvnprotelsa>
Content-Type: text/plain;
 charset="iso-8859-1"

>Paul West wrote:
>
> I might smile at the person but I'm not
>> exactly interested in how they take it. I seem more interested in
>> making myself appear in a way that will not arouse offence in them.
>>
>I hate smiles...

Why?
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 22:20:23 -0500 (CDT)
From: "Debora A. Orf" <dorf01ATnospammail.win.org>
To: Paul West <paulATnospamstationone.demon.co.uk>
cc: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com, kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: Re: Guru?
Message-ID: <Pine.GSO.3.96.980523222005.18621A-100000ATnospamwinc0>
Content-Type: TEXT/PLAIN; charset=US-ASCII

i met mine on a laugh :)

--debora a. orf
--programmer/analyst St. Charles City County Library District
--dorf01ATnospammail.win.org

"Life is a terminal disease, and it's sexually transmitted."
John Cleese, the Buddhist.
Date: Sun, 24 May 1998 00:10:30 EDT
From: Harsha1MTM <Harsha1MTMATnospamaol.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: The Force of Self-Realization
Message-ID: <6a5d5da2.35679db8ATnospamaol.com>

Harsha: Often we see and hear people comparing the colors that they see at
particular centers, etc. No doubt such discussions are useful for sharing
experiences and comparing. In the quest for the Ultimate Reality of the Self,
it is always good to ask, "Who am I who sees such a color or have such and
such experiences at such and such centers." In other words, the focus should
not be allowed to shift from the Seer to the extent that one becomes
unconscious and therefore lost in experience. If one finds oneself in
superconscious visionary realms sporting with other beings of light and joy,
again the aspirant should raise the same question, i.e., "Who am I who enjoys
these heavenly or celestial realms." The Shakti path is a path rich with
experiences of all types. As long as the focus is on experiences, no matter
how grand they may be, the Self cannot be Recognized as the underlying essence
and support for the Reality we experience at every level of existence. A
Knower of the Self understands the nature of experiences at all levels,
including the highest superconscious levels, and remains wholly indifferent.
It is only in the state of Nirvikalpa Samadhi that the Knower, Knowing, and
the Known are realized to be absolutely identical. Here, finally, the Seer
Rests in His Own Nature without the least effort or resistance.
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 21:20:19 -0700
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent <serpentATnospamdomin8rex.com>
To: Kristin <KristinATnospamaol.com>
Cc: oreaATnospamerols.com, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Scared/Help
Message-Id: <3.0.5.32.19980523212019.008e5100ATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"

  Brilliant!! Awesome! Perfect!
 
  "Freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose.
   Nothin' ain't worth nuthin but it's free."

  You you have this person Kirsten the person, who you don't know or like
very much..

  There is this person Kirsten the ski racer.. this person is an aspect of
spirit.
  Talent comes from the muse, whether it be sport or art.. one does not ski
race with the conscious mind... it's reflexes are too slow. Ski racing must
be done in the Zen state, right? Thoughtless and fully in the millisecond.. :)

  So you ran away into Kirsten the Fearless Spirit, ski racing... and when
you couldn't do that anymore, along comes K. to help you be Kirsten the
spirit at normal speed of life.. sounds like perfection, to me..
   So what you are losing to K., is Kirsten the person, and since you did
not love her anyways, what's the loss?
   K. is taking away something you did not want anyways.. so why the grief?
   
   You would not be grieving at the fragmentation of the person Kirsten, if
you did not indeed, love her very much, and know her well enough to feel
empathy for her hurts..
   Your nasty childhood was Goddess divine plan, to make what you are doing
now, easier.. yes, easier!!! Imagine how much more upsetting it would be to
lose your ego self if you loved it completely and knew it intimately??

  K. is taking away the stuff you didn't want. It is a big pile of manure
with noxious fumes, and it is getting cleared one shovel load at a time..
and you cannot shovel it away without seeing it and smelling it as it
goes... keep your eye on your work and keep shovelling.. and stand up
straight and put on a smile.. you'll fool your body into making you feel
better!
   Blessings, A.

At 02:01 PM 23/05/98 EDT, Kristin wrote:
>
>I does not seem like this will ever end, like traveling in a tunnel, but
there
>is no light at the end of it. I feel like I am searching for something I do
>not know, the scary part though is, I am searching for myself, and I am
>afraid, because I do not know myself, make any sense?
>
>Love,
>Kristin
>
>
>
Date: Sat, 23 May 1998 21:17:07 -0700
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent <serpentATnospamdomin8rex.com>
To: "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <930359ATnospamaloe.ulima.edu.pe>
Cc: "Kundalini List" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: Subconscious pressure and returning smiles
Message-Id: <3.0.5.32.19980523211707.008e1dc0ATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"

At 10:03 PM 23/05/98 -0500, Roberto Gonzales del Valle wrote:
>>Paul West wrote:
>>
>> I might smile at the person but I'm not
>>> exactly interested in how they take it. I seem more interested in
>>> making myself appear in a way that will not arouse offence in them.
>>>
>>I hate smiles...
>
>
>Why?
>
>
  David, I admire your way with words, but sometimes Roberto appreciates a
translator..

  Roberto, David was commenting on the contradiction Paul has made.. If he
is trying not to arouse offence, then he _is_ concerned with how his smiles
will be taken. He wants people to not be offended, so he smiles.
  So David made a joke about hating smiles.. to point put that Paul is
contradicting himself again..
   I think that if David really did not like smiles, then he would not make
jokes, eh?
      Blessings, A.
    
   When I was in comedy school they said that it's not a joke, if ya have
ta explain it.
>
>
Date: Sun, 24 May 1998 00:30:11 EDT
From: Imtgxxx <ImtgxxxATnospamaol.com>
To: KristinATnospamaol.com
Cc: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: Re: Scared/Help
Message-ID: <b4956aa4.3567a255ATnospamaol.com>

Kristin writes
 And look the feelings that I have been brought up, are very painful, and has
been very disturbing to me. I wish that I never had to deal with them, but I
guess it is time I do so.

tg: If that is what you want, then do it. If not, don't.
  
Kristen: I do not want to carry on with the way I am feeling its not me, and
I do not enjoy it at all. I have never been someone who shares my feelings
openly, this is all new to me.

Kristen, most people, especially here on this list, do not mind anyone sharing
their feelings about their pain and suffering. This list can truly be a
blessing for one who really wants to transcend their pain, their ego. I know,
I was one who brought my own stuff to the list to transcend. And everyone
was wonderful.

Kristen: Lets just say, I need support, and some people to talk to you, I
am not sure though, what I really need right now.

We are not a support group in the way that we support your ego stuff. If that
is what you are wanting, join another group - there are many out there. We
are a shoulder to cry on once, maybe twice, but after that, we like to see
that you are looking for a solution. Otherwise, it drains not only the person
listening, but you as well.
 
 Kristen: To tell you the truth, I am kinda taken back right now.

tg: Good! Stepping back is a start.

Kristen: I am not to sure what to say, and I do not want to say it wrong
either. But here it goes, I never understood, how people make judgements and
 comments on others when they do not understand, or truly know the person.

I know your essential Self Kristen. You are a beautiful, loving, caring, and
strong person, with a lot to give - I know that and I know you know that.
What your ego thinks of me and my comments are of no consequence to me. Your
story's to tell are of no consequence to me. They are unimportant.
(agggghhhhh... can you feel your ego squirming in pain with this???). I
judged willingly, knowing that it was only myself I was judging. It was
something I needed to look at, so I did.

Are you ready to transcend this ego crap, or do you want to dwell in it a
while longer? Doesn't really matter to me. I want you to be happy more than
anything, and if being in pain and suffering makes you happy, then more power
to you.

Kristen: I just would never make a stab at person with out understanding or
 knowing the person, so I am not going to get in to it with you.

tg: You are right, I don't know or understand the person kristen (with the
little k - the one who does not want to transcend anything). I don't know
what all you've been through besides what you have told me. I haven't walked
a mile in your shoes. I am only here to learn my lessons. What you do with
yours is up to you.

What is my lesson here? I found that I was doing what you were doing....
whining and complaining to a few people offline about my *dilemma* with you,
but not doing a damn thing about it. I decided to take someone's advice.
Face my dilemma head on. Speak my truth (with a little t). Everything I said
was totally meaningless in Truth. But for me, I no longer have to complain to
anyone else. I faced my fears.... my fear being you. I no longer have to
whine and get people to listen. I have transcended my fear. Thank you for
that.

(Let me apologize publically to those I whined to - SORRY).

Whining can be fun for a while I learned. There is some power in it - you
feel a bit of comraderie it seems. But the dilemma continues -- it fact it
escalates. I have now made whining one of my famous *red flags*.... that
would mean that I must face something head on should I catch myself doing it.

Kristen: You have the right to make what ever opinion about me that you
would like,

tg: Thank you.

Kristen: and I am not going to go out of my way to make you change your
mind,

tg: You cannot make me change my mind anymore than any of us could make you
change your mind. The Power is within our own Selves to do any changing.

 Kristen: because I need my all the energy I have right now to take care of
myself.

tg: This is good to hear.... that you will take care of yourself.

 Kristen: I hope nothing I said above, came out the wrong way, I did not want
it to in any means

tg: Nothing you said came out wrong. You said what you wanted to say, as
well as I did too. Thank you for teaching me a very important lesson I hope
to always remember. Much love to you in whatever you choose to do.

xxxtg

* I don't want my posting coming out with a 'G' rating. Nobody would buy it *

http://members.aol.com/Teeegeee/tgsplace.html <~~~~ on the web now!

  
Date: Sun, 24 May 1998 01:06:09 EDT
From: Kristin <KristinATnospamaol.com>
To: ImtgxxxATnospamaol.com, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Scared/Help
Message-ID: <32159689.3567aac2ATnospamaol.com>

In a message dated 98-05-24 00:30:11 EDT, you write:

>We are not a support group in the way that we support your ego stuff. If
that is >what you are wanting, join another group - there are many out there.
We are a >shoulder to cry on once, maybe twice, but after that, we like to see
that you are >looking for a solution. Otherwise, it drains not only the
person listening, but you as >well.

I am not looking for a support group, maybe what I said came out wrong. I am
not sure how to say what I would like, and actually convey it with out it
being taken the wrong way.

>I know your essential Self Kristen. You are a beautiful, loving, caring, and
strong >person, with a lot to give - I know that and I know you know that.
What your ego >thinks of me and my comments are of no consequence to me. Your
story's to tell >are of no consequence to me. They are unimportant.
(agggghhhhh... can you feel >your ego squirming in pain with this???). I
judged willingly, knowing that it was only >myself I was judging. It was
something I needed to look at, so I did.

I do not feel my ego squirming with pain, nothing at all. I know that you know
a great deal about me, but you do not know the fine details that make me. Some
of those details make up a lot of this.

>Are you ready to transcend this ego crap, or do you want to dwell in it a
while >longer? Doesn't really matter to me. I want you to be happy more than
anything, >and if being in pain and suffering makes you happy, then more power
to you.

I am and have been ready to transcend this ego crap, it's hard though. I am
not happy right now, and I do not enjoy it one bit. It's not me, and I want to
be back t my happy self.

>(with the little k - the one who does not want to transcend anything).

I do want to transcend many things, and that is what you do not know about me,
you have no clue what I want. So, I will give a little insight, I want to be
happy once again, I am not happy right now, not at all. I am willing to work,
and try anything, but I am lost, and not sure where to go.

>What is my lesson here? I found that I was doing what you were doing....
whining >and complaining to a few people offline about my *dilemma* with you,
but not doing >damn thing about it. I decided to take someone's advice.
Face my dilemma head >on. Speak my truth (with a little t). Everything I
said was totally meaningless in >Truth. But for me, I no longer have to
complain to anyone else. I faced my fears.... >my fear being you. I no
longer have to whine and get people to listen. I have >transcended my fear.
Thank you for that.

I glad you faced your dilemma, and faced you fears of me. You are welcome. I
am not the whining type, it does not work with me. I have whinnied a few
times, but who has not. But I usually try not to whine, its not me at all. I
have survived in competitive ski racing the past two years with no ligaments
or tendons in my knee, I never whined one day.

>Whining can be fun for a while I learned. There is some power in it - you
feel a bit >of comraderie it seems. But the dilemma continues -- it fact it
escalates. I have >now made whining one of my famous *red flags*.... that
would mean that I must >face something head on should I catch myself doing it.

I have always tried to face my problems head on, except those ones I hid
behind my skiing. I am trying to face them head on now, but its hard when you
let something build up so, and then on top of it add a few other things to it.

>tg: Nothing you said came out wrong. You said what you wanted to say, as
well >as I did too. Thank you for teaching me a very important lesson I hope
to always >remember. Much love to you in whatever you choose to do.

Yeah, I know I said what I wanted, as well as you did to, just sometimes it
comes across the wrong way, or did not sound right. I hope everything I said
above came out right also. You welcome for what ever lesson I may have
thought you.

Love,
Kristin

  
Date: Sun, 24 May 1998 02:56:05 -0500
From: Roberto Gonzales del Valle <930359ATnospamaloe.ulima.edu.pe>
To: Mystress Angelique Serpent <serpentATnospamdomin8rex.com>, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Subconscious pressure and returning smiles
Message-ID: <3567D294.E037BDEAATnospamaloe.ulima.edu.pe>

Mystress Angelique Serpent, wrote

> At 10:03 PM 23/05/98 -0500, Roberto Gonzales del Valle wrote:
> >>Paul West wrote:
> >>
> >> I might smile at the person but I'm not
> >>> exactly interested in how they take it. I seem more interested in
> >>> making myself appear in a way that will not arouse offence in them.
> >>>
> >>I hate smiles...
> >
> >
> >Why?
> >
> >
> David, I admire your way with words, but sometimes Roberto appreciates a
> translator..

Thank you mistress, you are always so heplfull

>
>
> Roberto, David was commenting on the contradiction Paul has made.. If he
> is trying not to arouse offence, then he _is_ concerned with how his smiles
> will be taken. He wants people to not be offended, so he smiles.
> So David made a joke about hating smiles.. to point put that Paul is
> contradicting himself again..
> I think that if David really did not like smiles, then he would not make
> jokes, eh?
> Blessings, A.
>
> When I was in comedy school they said that it's not a joke, if ya have
> ta explain it.

Why?

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