1997/10/01 00:04
kundalini-l-d Digest V97 #480
kundalini-l-d Digest Volume 97 : Issue 480
Today's Topics:
Surrender
new guy's ? re: managing the energy
Charming people I have known. . . .
RE: Beware Evan--A Lobster is loose, and Joe's Truths
Surrender
AutoPost from Kundalini Resource Center
Re: Surrender
Re: Negativity and Aura colors
Re: Dearest Lobsterji
re: Surrender
Re: reality and fantasy
Re: Negativity and Aura colors
Re: reality and fantasy
Re: Ego/ego
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 97 13:47:35 PDT
From: Eric Kieselhorst <redATnospamearthlink.net>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Surrender
Message-Id: <9709301347.18901fATnospamFIREWALL>
Message-Id: <3.0.1.32.19970930134006.00833860ATnospamearthlink.net>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Hi K-list folks. I need some advice. Last night while asleep
my entire body felt as though there was a jet engine inside it
on full throttle. In the dream I couldn't hear myself yell over
the deafening roar, while at the same time my body was seriously
vibrating and contorting into various positions in response to
this energy (in my dream that is). While still in the dream I
thought to myself "Well, at least I have the K-list to talk with
after this is over."
When I finally awoke I was drained and full of energy; my spine
was vibrating up a storm. I thought about the advice you all have
given others in the past about surrendering to the process. Something
Gloria said in a recent post came to mind; when you're feeling anxious
ask yourself if you're ok right now, if the answer is yes, focus on
that since the "now" is the only thing that is real. (I apologize if
I'm misquoting\paraphrasing here). So I'm lying there saying "yes
I'm okay right now" over and over. Then a little voice in me said,
"Well that's all fine and dandy, but where will you be to reassure
me when you fall back asleep?!" I actually laughed out loud at that,
but I really don't have an answer for the question.
How do I surrender to the process while asleep? Much of my K activity
seems to happen while asleep. The roar I speak of has in the past been
isolated to my head. This is the first time it was my entire body. I
felt as though my body was going to disintegrate from the vibration and
sound.
In a more general sense, how do all of you surrender to the process?
(that is to say, for those who approach it in that manner). Are there
particular methods, visualizations, affirmations etc that seem to work
for you? Do any of these help when K activity arises while you sleep?
Thank you all in advance for any advice you might have to offer.
eric
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 14:28:47 PDT
From: "Craig Chalquist" <chalquistATnospamhotmail.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: new guy's ? re: managing the energy
Message-ID: <19970930212848.9141.qmailATnospamhotmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain
Hello:
I just found out about this mailing list and am seeking advice on
managing painful kundalini experiences. I've been having them for
several years now, neurological exams and therapy don't help, and my
dreams suggest that the energy (or whatever) that hits me as often as
several times a week can be channeled somehow, but I'm not sure how. If
you have any specific ideas on directing that energy, please e-mail me
(chalquistATnospamhotmail.com), as I will probably unsubscribe soon due to the
high volume of e-mails not related to the kind of kundalini-related info
I'm seeking. I'm also interested in knowing about kundalini study or
support groups in my area (Simi Valley, California)...not the New Ageish
think-positive light-and-rainbows stuff but serious info for people
trying to manage aroused transpersonal forces. Thanks very much!
Craig
"Cain's Self-Exploration Page":
http://www.geocities.com/athens/acropolis/8816
"Manmade": http://www.angelfire.com/me/chalquist
"Cornerstone DV page": members.aol.com/scottsimi/index.html
______________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 16:43:05 -0500
From: MrNamasteATnospamwebtv.net (MrNamaste)
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Charming people I have known. . . .
Message-Id: <199709302143.OAA21933ATnospammailtod-1.alma.webtv.net>
I cannot address the whithers, the whethers, the whereto's of this
discussion about negative people in the immediate environment. Such is
simply not my nature, my innate predisposition.
I will simply try to succinctly tell you what it was like for me. (I
am leaving out many details.)
In July1996 I had the great good personal fortune to have uninterrupted
10 hour access to the newly born Kundalini Mailing List. Many things
thing were of great interest to me, but the sentence I returned to again
and again and again was somebody's letter wherein I read, "As all of
you already know I, too, had to abandon all of my previous friends.." --
this is my paraphrase and I kept returning to this one sentence alone
for it told me that all these people on the newly formed list had hashed
this out in great detail at great length.
Although I have not yet fully learned to value my time and energy --- I
was nonetheless capable of IMMEDIATELY dispensing with any guilt I had
hithertoo held about 86-ing just about everyone from my life. I have
close deep relationships with every member of my nuclear family and I am
in close (long-distance phone call) association with precisely ONE
person from the entirty of my existence this lifetime prior to the FULL
blown Kundalini Awakening.
When I am in public, I aspire to do what Nancy has so kindly put into
words for me --- I put on a functioning personality. I NEVER leave the
sanctity of my house without first making sure that my shoes are
perfectly tied -- both metaphorically and literally. I would not want
ANYONE among the general public at large to look upon my personal
"example" as a negative proof about Shakti, Herself, or the spiritual
path in general.
As I have undergone an absolute, --- make that, Absolute transformation
which is irrevokable -- and isn't going to "go away", as I once so
naively presumed -- it has been mandatory for me to release the past and
the people within it.
For you see: I am just the same, only different.
My old friends and acquaintances only understand the first part of that
equation -- not the later.
I will share with you that I occassionally come across individuals
whose vibratory frequency is absolutely repugnant to me. I stay away
from such persons as best I can --- I staunchly maintain mere
sociability with no intimacy -- if life circumstances are such that I
have to remain in their toxic presence for any amount of time.
Nowadays, I try to keep my external social affairs as uncluttered as my
deepest (highest?) meditative states. This is NOT easy, and I
frequently fail miserably. But I try. One thing that has helped me
considerably is to seriously examine for myself, in so far as whom I
allow into the sanctity of my private life is, "Will this person
seriously be better off for having known me?" I mean in the long term
-- will my influence have touched that individual in a meaningful
manner? Can I seriously say that this other person will be in a better
condition in the aftermath of having known me? Will I leave them in
better shape than when they arrived in my life?
If I cannot seriously answer in the affirmative, I do not become
involved. I know full well I cannot be all things to all people. That
is a function of the Divine.
This is only how it is for me and may very well NOT apply to you.
Peace.
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 22:43:58 +0100
From: Paul Fallon <pawlATnospamfirstnet.co.uk>
To: "'kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com'" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: RE: Beware Evan--A Lobster is loose, and Joe's Truths
Message-ID: <01BCCDF2.82795260ATnospammirage5.legend.co.uk>
Mistress A said:
You are probably one of the wisest sanest happiest heads on the list, and
you will be missed by more than me!
I concur, JP. I particularly remember a post of yours cheering me (and, I guess, others) up when I first introduced myself.
As for your instructive advice to the absent Ewen, "I can see nothing wrong with it but wisps of vapors, fleeting foggy morning light with the noon sun racing by . . ."
Paul: not ending, not beginning ending, maybe ending beginning....
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 18:16:19 -0400 (EDT)
From: ImtgxxxATnospamaol.com
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Surrender
Message-ID: <970930180728_1957219835ATnospamemout19.mail.aol.com>
Eric wrote....
<< In a more general sense, how do all of you surrender to the process?
(that is to say, for those who approach it in that manner). Are there
particular methods, visualizations, affirmations etc that seem to work
for you? Do any of these help when K activity arises while you sleep?
>>
Eric....
I can tell you what worked for me while sleeping -- Throughout the day when a
particular K activity was occuring, I would say an affirmation (mine was
'this isn't real - this is just an illusion - I surrender my thoughts,
feelings, and perceptions to You' (you being the Holy Spirit) ). I said this
so much because at that time I was walking a thin line between sanity &
insanity, and had never heard of K - so would usually say it when I was
afraid. Needless to say, it was said many times a day during that time.
Lo & Behold, when I would dream and be afraid, I found my dream persona would
say it too, and next thing you know, I would wake up! Immediately! (before
the boogie man got me).
I realize that yours isn't come from a place of fear, but an affirmation just
for your activity that mirrors itself in your dreams, would most likely work
also if you say it enough.
Sweet Dreams,
xxxtg
""If I would have known they were going to make me Pope, I would have studied
harder." - Pope John Paul II
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 12:42:36 -1000 (HST)
From: Michelle Khan <KhansATnospamsunet.net>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: AutoPost from Kundalini Resource Center
Message-Id: <199709302242.MAA00764ATnospamhaleakala.aloha.net>
I am going through a kundalinin experience at the moment
and a lot of what I have read is frightening. I am a Reiki therapist and
I meditate everyday but not for a long period of time. There seems to
be no one to ask about this incredible experience. It seems to me that
many of the episodes I've read about are very different. I wish that I could just talk to some one that knows more about the subject.
I have experienced electricity flowing through my body so
intensely that I too as many others thought that I may burn up in spontaneous combustion. What I experience now is the energy at the
rectal area and at first I thought it had something to do with Reiki. When I consulted my instructor, she told me that I might be experiencing the release of the kundalini energy. I really did not
know a thing about this and the more I read the more questions I have as to what will happen next. Is there some hot line for people who are experiencing similar things?
I would appreciate hearing from anyone who could help answer some of my questions? I am on a spiritual path and have
been for quite some time. I have only been doing Reiki for two years
and meditating for about three. It surprises me that this would happen to someone like me. But I do feel blessed and I am sure that God has
a plan for my life.
Sincerely,
Michelle Khan
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 18:27:38 +0000
From: Nancy <NancyATnospammagiccity.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Surrender
Message-ID: <34314496.36D4ATnospammagiccity.com>
Eric Kieselhorst wrote:
>While still in the dream I thought to myself "Well, at least I have the K-list to talk with
> after this is over."
I love this line, Eric!
I'm not an expert on kundalini or dreams, but it sounds like your
"consciousness" and "higher self" are in conflict. (I hate using these
words because I think they somehow disect an integrated experience, but
I guess words is what we have!)
You consciousness seems to feel unprotected when you leave it to
discover the great unknown. Perhaps you laughed because you know on an
intuitive level that consciousness's demands are silly.
I don't have any specific advice. Just thought I'd pass on my
perspective.
Good luck Eric. I am also happy to know that I can talk about this weird
stuff that happens to the k-list.
Namaste,
Nancy
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 20:59:20 -0400 (EDT)
From: LibraKat11ATnospamaol.com
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Negativity and Aura colors
Message-ID: <970930205715_1866015186ATnospamemout03.mail.aol.com>
Dear tg,
Thanks for the info on the color purple. I've been thinking about it and
I've been through this before, but this time it's slightly different. Also,
I found out something else about it. I kept hearing the name St. Germane
(sp.?) and when I finally acknowledged that last night, the purple sort of
flamed into a huge shimmering shape. So now my question is this: Who the
heck is St. Germane??
I appreciate your input on the negativity. I do know in my heart that it
will pass (as averything does, thank goodness!!), but I've been puzzled about
it appearing so suddenly and being sooo bothered by it. Not in the since of
impatience, more like just being very distressed by it. You really nailed it
when you said I need to accept where I'm at, because I'd been feeling
somewhat guilty about my reaction and yet in my heart, knew I had no reason
to. Thanks for putting that in a clear light for me!
Thanks!
Kathy
<< Prior to my K awakening (a month or so prior), I saw only this bright deep
purple light - going from large to small, then large to small, over and over
again. A friend later told me that it was the 3rd eye chakra (which may
explain why I later *saw* so many things). So when it appeared in my
meditations, I just concentrated on that. He also explained that
concentrating on the one chakra all the time gives an unbalance - that it
would be better to concentrate on a balance of all the colors, via
visualization. Whether that is true, I don't know, but makes sense.
Re: the negative vibes from old friends -- and this too shall pass. I
remember going thru that - couldn't stand being around them! Just go with
the flow, accept them where they are, BUT just as importantly, accept
yourself where you are right now. I promise it will pass and you will be
able to be around them once again with complete acceptance and be able to
laugh at the negativity. It'll remind you of a comedian - most of their
skits are very negative, but soooo funny!
>>
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 22:50:46 -0700
From: E Jason <vv60ATnospamdial.pipex.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com, jan.watsonATnospamsympatico.ca,
MrNamaste <MrNamasteATnospamwebtv.net>
Subject: Re: Dearest Lobsterji
Message-ID: <3431E4B6.5FE9ATnospamdial.pipex.com>
MrNamaste wrote:
> As a list newbie, I can tell you that for me Sri Flarity's posting was
> very insightful and helpful.
Exactly so. It was excellent. It was also very well focussed.
> I wish the best for both of you.
Thank you.
Let me tell you a little story about another list I was on for many months. It was a
Buddhist List, very intelligent people, very experienced practioners. They were very
rational and analytical. They also used a Buddhist technique of tearing a person to
pieces on both an intellectual and personal basis. This is really to see if the persons
arguments are based on understanding, equanamity and genuine understanding or just
dharma-babble (dharma means Buddhist teaching).
On this forum I used a paradoxical, contradictory style of nonsense writing (which Joe
likes) which is designed to get past the rational mind. Most of them hated this -
actually hated it - venom came my way with an emotional blast (that I could pick up on)
that would effect me physically. I found it very painful and hurtful to be amongst such
'spiritual' people who were so petty and spiteful.
They did not consider kindness or courtesy as of any neccessity. They were however trying
to be kind and show me the error of my way. They therefore had potential for change and
could develop in spite of themselves.
After about two months I had to compromise my style to the more rational style they
preferred and also talk to a person who I had little interest in but was one of the main
email posters. Because my style had changed, the assumption was I had learnt the error of
my approach and the superiority of their insights was finally beginning to have an
effect. When I pointed out that the change in style was due to their ineptitude - they
saw this as an excuse (of course).
The forum did change, people did not lose their rationally or their
considerable intellectual prowess but a very subtle, yet perceptible change did occur.
Partly through my efforts and more importantly through the innate goodness and kindness
of the people involved.
Now when I told people of some of the things that went on (during the initial stages),
their response was - 'why do you spend time with these people?'
The answer is because you care enough to do so, you see the potential and have the
knowledge of how to develop that. People can not progress without capacity to do so. They
may think they want spirituality, when what they want is stimulation or attention.
Therefore when you see Joe saying things that to you seem he is losing something (he had
a terrible idea that I had all kind of abilities and so on) - he may in fact be gaining
and moving on. Therefore I am pleased with what he has said because it is in his best
interests. Do not look to the superficiality of words . . .
People do not understand why I am sometimes abusive, sarcatic, kind, arrogant, humble,
dismissive etc etc. It could be because I am a split personality. It might just be that
is what people need to hear and the way they need to hear it . . .
You must learn to sense the underlying motivations of peoples behaviour. People have been
on the end of my claws (someone today was begging me to be abusive towards them - I
deleted the post) Other people have been nurtured and supported, challanged and so. Do I
make mistakes? Of course but I know how to rectify mistakes in myself and others . . .
Most of all like everyone on this forum I am a fellow traveller. We are in this together.
Each according to their understanding and knowing offers the best they can.
God Bless Us One and All
Most Kind Regards,
Lobster
Gee!
PS What do you call a Lobster with one claw?
Answer:
Half eaten . . .
ARC
http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/town/place/vv60/
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 19:26:50 -0500 (CDT)
From: hbarrettATnospamix.netcom.com (Holly N. Barrett, Ph.D.)
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: re: Surrender
Message-Id: <199710010026.TAA19656ATnospamdfw-ix9.ix.netcom.com>
Unfortunately or fortunately, surrender means exactly what it says. K
operates while you sleep because you must surrender will in order to
sleep. Same's true when you're awake. To me, trying to facilitate
this energy by visualization or some such willful effort is futile and
may in fact shore up an illusion that you have control -- an illusion
that is destined to later smash into smithereens like your
grandmother's china in a rockslide. Better to say come into my heart,
god/dess, and I thank you in advance for leaving my organs intact so I
can do your will just as soon as I, with your help, again please,
figure out what this might be. Joy is the clue. Holly
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 19:17:03 -0700 (PDT)
From: M <chooseagainATnospamthegrid.net>
To: acarreATnospamconcentric.net
Cc: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: reality and fantasy
Message-Id: <199710010217.TAA14995ATnospamgridsat.thegrid.net>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
At 03:03 PM 9/30/97 -0400, acarre wrote:
>Hello Lobster,
>
>I understand your point, and I think it's good to bring it up sometimes,
>just wanted to had a couple of "B-mols" to it.
>
>You said:
>"So how can we differentiate the real from the spurious? Its simple
>really. The Real has
>no doubts and improves the overall well-being of the person and the
>spurious will justify
>the validity of its experience . . ."
>
>Jesus when he choose the cross, did he improve is overall well being?
>Knowing, being, the being we refer to is an important factor in what
>will draw the line between reality and fantasy, if their is a real line
>to be drawn.
>
>PS: don't put to much Light into the e-mail it could become a reality.
>:-)
>
>In Peace Love and Light
>Antoine
>
Another great answer! You are hot today!
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 22:12:27 -0700
From: indra <indraATnospamsmartt.com>
To: LibraKat11ATnospamaol.com
CC: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Negativity and Aura colors
Message-ID: <3431DBBB.68FEATnospamsmartt.com>
LibraKat11ATnospamaol.com wrote:
>
> Dear tg,
>
> Thanks for the info on the color purple. I've been thinking about it and
> I've been through this before, but this time it's slightly different. Also,
> I found out something else about it. I kept hearing the name St. Germane
> (sp.?) and when I finally acknowledged that last night, the purple sort of
> flamed into a huge shimmering shape. So now my question is this: Who the
> heck is St. Germane??
>
> I appreciate your input on the negativity. I do know in my heart that it
> will pass (as averything does, thank goodness!!), but I've been puzzled about
> it appearing so suddenly and being sooo bothered by it. Not in the since of
> impatience, more like just being very distressed by it. You really nailed it
> when you said I need to accept where I'm at, because I'd been feeling
> somewhat guilty about my reaction and yet in my heart, knew I had no reason
> to. Thanks for putting that in a clear light for me!
>
> Thanks!
> Kathy
> << Prior to my K awakening (a month or so prior), I saw only this bright deep
> purple light - going from large to small, then large to small, over and over
> again. A friend later told me that it was the 3rd eye chakra (which may
> explain why I later *saw* so many things). So when it appeared in my
> meditations, I just concentrated on that. He also explained that
> concentrating on the one chakra all the time gives an unbalance - that it
> would be better to concentrate on a balance of all the colors, via
> visualization. Whether that is true, I don't know, but makes sense.
>
> Re: the negative vibes from old friends -- and this too shall pass. I
> remember going thru that - couldn't stand being around them! Just go with
> the flow, accept them where they are, BUT just as importantly, accept
> yourself where you are right now. I promise it will pass and you will be
> able to be around them once again with complete acceptance and be able to
> laugh at the negativity. It'll remind you of a comedian - most of their
> skits are very negative, but soooo funny!
> >>
Kathy !
What tg shared is very true. You may also find yourself laughing at your
self too for past negative actions or memories. We actually lighten our
load of the dross when we are able to acknowledge and laugh at our own
foibles.
Indra
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 21:55:13 -0700
From: E Jason <vv60ATnospamdial.pipex.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com, jan.watsonATnospamsympatico.ca, acarreATnospamconcentric.net
Subject: Re: reality and fantasy
Message-ID: <3431D7B1.26EAATnospamdial.pipex.com>
acarre wrote:
> You said:
> "So how can we differentiate the real from the spurious? Its simple
> really. The Real has
> no doubts and improves the overall well-being of the person and the
> spurious will justify
> the validity of its experience . . . "
>
> Jesus when he choose the cross, did he improve his overall well being?
> Knowing, being, the being we refer to is an important factor in what
> will draw the line between reality and fantasy, if there is a real line
> to be drawn.
This is a good point.
Is our point of referenece ego or other peoples well being . . .
I will answer this with the understanding that Christ was an advanced mystic. (If he was
God apply to nearest fantasy peddlars for the 'real' meaning). Bring your own tamborine -
'Save me Jesus'.
Christ did not choose the Cross.
Because of his humility and profound understanding, he spoke the Truth. The Truth is
always hated. It has never been otherwise.
If I say you are advanced souls, you will love me for recognising your profound and
special status. If I say you are a speck of dust and your 'spiritual experiences' of no
consequence - how will you feel? He does not really know us?
I know you . . .
For am I not equally vain and filled with self importance?
Now if you Love people - not with the new age wishy washy - we are all one - everything
is Goddess - you are a child of the universe (which some people need, being love and
attention starved) but with a confrontation to grow up and behave like adults what will
happen?
This is the position of Christ. This is the path of the sacrificed God. Christ because of
his abilities and words, turned peoples worlds upside down. K does that.
However and this is the important part, that which is the body (the ego) is destroyed -
it is after all perishible - the Spirit is eternal.
So we find the Spirit.
We come to the Spirit.
We focus on the Spirit.
Jesus (the ego) dies. Christ the Spirit is born.
> PS: don't put to much Light into the e-mail it could become a reality.
> :-)
Amen.
"All things Bright and Beautiful
the Lord God made them All . . . "
Most Kind Regards
Lobster
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 23:04:38 -0700
From: Morgana Wyze <morganaATnospambest.com>
To: david.bozziATnospamsnet.net
CC: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Ego/ego
Message-ID: <3431E7F6.74B3ATnospambest.com>
David Bozzi wrote:
>
> SchrLLATnospamaol.com wrote:
>
> > Thank you, David, for your comment.
> > Do you realize how many people are in mental institutes or under intensive
> > psychiactric care for schizophrenia because they "got rid of their egos?"
>
> They are in mental institutions because they live in a society that
> denies the spiritual and Its' process. Not because they are called to
> awaken.
>
> > I am serious about this . I have a sense that the cream of the crop , the
> > most evolved of our century have been treated as schizophrenics. They are not
> > taught the things we have been fortunate enough to learn (by ourselves). They
> > were locked up, drugged, their brains zapped, because they were considered
> > CRAZY.
> > I am not yelling at you. I AM YELLING AT THE PEOPLE ON THIS LIST!
> > Wake up, folks! But for the Grace oif God there goes you and me!
>
> > Deal with it. ATnospam->->--
>
> There is nothing to defend.
I work with geniune schizophrenics, and there is NOTHING spiritual about
their state. There could be people who are mis-diagnosed, but a genuine
schizo has very dark and angry energy, a child-like mental state, and
thinks in circle instead of logical sequential thought. There is no
genuine creativity which I have observed in these thoughts...they are
not associative, simply subjective reactions.
Morgana
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