1997/09/29 10:27
kundalini-l-d Digest V97 #474
kundalini-l-d Digest Volume 97 : Issue 474
Today's Topics:
Re: drenched in sweat.
[Fwd: Re: Ego/ego]
Re: ways of the heart
Re: kundalini-l-d Digest V97 #473
Re: Pentecostal Kundalini
Light dripping
RE: drenched in sweat.
Dream
RE: Trusting the "U"
Unidentified subject!
Re: crossroad [redux]
Re: The Kundalini Perspective
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 02:18:18
From: acarre <acarreATnospamconcentric.net> (by way of Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistressATnospamdomin8rex.com>)
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: drenched in sweat.
Message-Id: <3.0.1.16.19970929021818.6d278814ATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Nancy (by way of Mystress Angelique Serpent ) wrote:
> dor wrote:
>
> > you lie awake night after night drenched in sweat.
>
> Four or five years ago, I had this experience! I had no idea what it
> was
> and didn't know until today. (I guess I thought I was exercising too
> much or hormones were raging (strange for being in my 20s at the
> time).
> Also, six and seven years back I used to get painful headaches behind
> my
> eyes. I read somewhere (maybe on the list) that eye headaches can be
> related to opening of the third eye. I survived by downing otc
> sinus/cold medicine. Has anyone else had sweats and headaches?
>
> I have never really known if my experience was kundalini. I haven't
> had
> some of the other strange physical side effects which dor and others
> have described. I only had everything else in my life fall apart.
> (That
> sure was fun!) But my health and body is doing great, better than
> ever.
>
> The other quality I have noticed is that I am becoming stranger and
> stranger. I don't fit in with society. I am not antisocial, but I
> refuse to participate in activities which don't provide benefit for me
>
> or others. (I've resigned from several community boards and committees
>
> which fell into this category.) I do pull out a personality to relate
>
> as is necessary. But at a core level, I do not conform. (Come to think
>
> of it, nonconformity was always a latent quality of mine.)
>
> Anyway, after this post, I am beginning to believe that maybe I did
> have
> a kundalini awakening. It just was more gentle physically than most
> people's. Does this make sense???
>
> Namaste,
> Nancy
Yes it does nancy,
You must be the calm type of person, and others must feel also calm in
your presence. The kundalini, add not to force it's way into you, yet.
But I don't think the procees is finished. Bigguer flows, and deeper
ones should start in you.
The fire is burning soflty, so it doesn't need to explode in you, but a
time will come when the fire will receive more oxygen (sky energy) and
have more wood (earth energy) to really start burning.
Kundalini awaikening, doesn't have to be rude, if you are ready to make
of your ego a part of you, and not just you. But for that you have to
listen to what is happening now, at this moment.
Antoine
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 02:16:23
From: indra <indraATnospamsmartt.com> (by way of Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistressATnospamdomin8rex.com>)
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: [Fwd: Re: Ego/ego]
Message-Id: <3.0.1.16.19970929021623.79dfdfa8ATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
SchrLLATnospamaol.com wrote:
>
> In a message dated 97-09-27 00:47:26 EDT, you write:
>
> << >
> > Namaste Indra,
> > I am intrigued by your statements about ego. Since I cannot function
> without
> > my ego ............................
> > Your statement that ego "probably shuts the windows and doors to
> > spirituality" makes me think that ego definition in the east and in the
> west
> > may not be the same. I would appreciate your comments. Linda ATnospam->->--
> >>
> Thank you for your thoughtful post.
> It appears that indeed the definitions are different. Perhaps this leads
to a
> lot of confusion. How does one know which ego one is talking about? Someone
> says do this with your ego and means eastern, and aother says do this and
> means western.
> There are so many definitions and confusion of terms. Sometimes reason can
> separate to the point of disintegration.
> Love integrates. LindaATnospam->->--
Hello Linda !
I could not attend to replies to all who have e-mailed me personally,
but I am in the process.
The Western idea or definition,of ego is that the conscious self is
considered the seat of consciousness.
In the West the physical brain is considered to be the seat of conscious
self (ego)
but in the Eastern idea the conscious principle of which ego ( the
separator of the internal and the external aspects of consciousness- the
subjective and the objective), is one aspect of the consciosuness.
Joseph Campbell put the idea of the difference in the two view points
very clearly.
He had said " In the West the notion is that the physical brain is the
source of consciosuness. But the traditional idea in the East, is that,
the brain is a function of consciousness which encapsulates
consciosuness and projects it in certain directions, in time and space.
In the East The Conscious principle comes first, then the physical body
and its powers."
The reason behind it is if self consciosuness or the ego in the western
sense be a function of the physical brain, then we should be able to
find that consciousness in a
dead person's physical brain. But it does not appear to be that way.
On the other hand in the Eastern view the physical brain is function of
consciousness
implies that the physical brain is the mechanism through which the
consciosuness
expresses itself.
Going further I may add that When we are awake, we are conscious,and
aware of our physical body and our environment.. We have the "I" ness,
knowing of its existence.
When we sleep we are not aware of our environment. But consciousness is
there but we are not aware of it. The autonomic nervous system doing its
work even when we sleep. But the "I"ness is not felt or not there.
When we wake up after the night's sleep we remember our "I" ness and we
know we are so -and -so.
But during our sleep where was our Conscious feeling of "I"ness?
Only when we are awake that our brain allows us to know our "I"ness, by
virtue of the memory.
If consciousness be a function of the physical brain then everytime we
sleep and we wake there would be different "I". In fact thsi is not hte
case.
But this "I " ness is not the ego but the ego is an aspect of it.
So, yes, you are right that there is a difference of terminology between
the Esat and the West. The Ego in the East termed Ahamkara the feeling
of "I" ness.
In this same e-mail I would also like to acknowledge and answer for the
question which
MrNamaste had.
Awareness is the willful application of our consciousness. Suppose you
are deeply engrossed in reading a very inetesting novel and you are so
absorbed in it that the clock in the room making the ticking sound , or
the ringing of the door bell, yet you do not hear them. The physical
ear, the nerves connecting it to the brain are there, but your awareness
is working through a different set of neurons of the brain and is
engrossed in the book you are reading. The neurons responsible for
hearing ,in your your brain are not fired, and this why you didn't hear
the door bell or the ticking clock.
So from this analysis we find that the consciousness is not awareness,
hence they are not synonomous.
I hope it helps you both to understand the idea I am trying to convey.
I just have couple of hours of my server time till the 1st of October.
but you can e-mail me any time, and I will answer them after October
1st.
In Love, Life and Light,
Indra
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 02:20:06
From: valerian <madammumATnospamptialaska.net> (by way of Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistressATnospamdomin8rex.com>)
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: ways of the heart
Message-Id: <3.0.1.16.19970929022006.80e76bc0ATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
> v: so - you are saying that the planetary energies are transmuting to
> > assist graduation from the solar plexus chakra to the heart chakra?
> gloria: Yes, it is the next step in evolution, which is to get to the
> point to activate kundalini. Kundalini is the individual power source
> for really taking one into deeper spiritual realities provided one is
> prepared.
<snip>
v: would you say that kundalini was akin to 'buddha nature' &/or wisdom,
or is it not a mental process? sounds rather like bein electrocuted so
far!
<snip>
> Gloria:
> This is karma/bhakti yoga it will get you there eventually, I
teach in
> the beginning Bhakti yoga which is the focus on devotion and love, this
> is a gentle way of getting heart centered. Once an individual has a
> great deal of humility, knows that he/she can't get there on their own,
> then they are really ready to move into the heart center. Humility takes
> you into the space of 'thy will and not mine' this is the key really
> that speeds up the awakening process for going into higher centers. This
> of course is tested, but when you really begin to pray for God's Will to
> be known with all of your heart, it manifests. Then your love of God
> takes form in the sense that you have the fruit...humility, joy, extreme
> love that releases at time in a flood of tears, and the kundalini
> releases with intense light, electricity, peace, acceptance etc..
> Once the person has this experience then I change the focus from
Bhakti
> to Laya which uses sound and some other exercises to increase the flow
> of kundalini. I am in the process of putting some of this down in my
> homepage for those who are interested and I'm going to do an intense
> training over the net as a retreat. It isn't there quite yet, but within
> the week it will be. Since January of this year I've been having visions
> of how to work through the net and out of body to help those individuals
> that spirit brings to me.
v: <--- very interested in pursueing these topics. understand - i am on
an isolated island in alaska where 'money talks' and the churches are
moldy, there are bars & churches & liquor stores (sinnerville)...
have been doing hatha yoga/meditation for many years alone.
<snip>
--
"Ah, good taste! What a dreadful thing! Taste is the enemy of
creativeness." PabloPicasso
valerie cooper
http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/7982/index.html
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 09:16:05 -0700
From: Mary Ellen Sweeney <choiceaquaATnospamearthlink.net>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
CC: kundalini-l-dATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: kundalini-l-d Digest V97 #473
Message-ID: <342FD445.7803ATnospamearthlink.net>
Hello to the K-Clan:
Wow. (Profound, eh?) Reading this list for the past few weeks has been like
receiving absolution. I started "playing" with K last November. I can call
it playing now because I had absolutely no idea what I was letting myself in
for. At first it was like opening myself to the Universe as a receiver of
all manner of insights, signs, and messages. I wondered if I had gone loopy,
but at the back of it there was a ring of truth and I trusted it for the most
part. It felt wonderful! I looked forward to every meditation session and
found I could even meditate _standing_ up in front of a big window that looks
out over the Atlantic, seeing all the life under the water. The electricity
was overwhelming. I literally bounced and crackled. I was working with two
books, K and the Chakras and K Evolution and Enlightenment. When I did the
exercises, it became very apparent that I had lived with at least partial K
for many years, as the energy would rip through the chakra along with the
knowledge of the exact circumstance where this work had already been done.
Sex was beyond spectacular with my husband and I enjoying "mind melds" that
left us glowing and chuckling for days.
In January, my Dad died and I really went over the edge. Meditation does not
come often or easily anymore. The morning of his death, I found myself
having a mental conversation with someone where I was telling the person that
I hadn't done something because Dad had just died. I called myself on it, in
horror, and stopped the thought. A couple of hours later, the call came that
he was gone. I had had a similar experience before my sister died, but that
was long before I had even heard of meditation, K, or even contemplated any
kind of spirituality. The very next meditation after his passing brought a
gently swirling kaliedoscope of colors that changed from green to pink to
blue to yellow and finally a blinding white light. Of course I had hoped
that he would speak to me and that our conversations would be clear and
fruitful. Now I think that he did and the colors carried his message. Weeks
later, we were passing the cemetery and I wondered aloud to my husband what
he would like on his headstone, when "I was right!" snapped into my head. I
know that was him, so typical, so quick, and funny.
When y'all talk about "The Dark Night of the Soul," I am relieved and
encouraged. These past few months have been a mental swamp, not because of
losing Dad really. I have known loss before and rejoice that he is with God.
No, this has been mental and emotional quicksand such as I have never known.
When it's too dark to meditate, there really is no light. For a while, I
dared not ask if I was insane, fearing the answer. Now, since joining the
list, I believe that I will get back into the light again and am starting to
feel more like myself. I actually had an idea the other day.<G> Everything
has been so unfocussed that days pass without my ever having accomplished
more than the absolute necessary and that only with great effort. I've
missed me. I wasn't really that bad of a person.<G> I sent a message about a
persistent pain in my right side that Gloria answered, telling me that it's
the liver chakra which indicates a reluctance to proceed on a spiritual path.
I believe she is correct. Wouldn't anyone be at least a bit reluctant to
continue for fear of bringing more "demons" to the fore? More the pity, that
pain cost me $5,000 when my doctor was convinced it was an acute
gallbladder. Not, I am perfectly healthy.
So, now that this worst time seems to be ending, I am starting to look
forward to clearing that liver chakra and moving on. It's been very helpful
to read about others' experiences in this pursuit. There really isn't any
turning back, is there? It was a tempting thought some months ago, to
somehow undo what I had done to myself and continue living "normally." OTOH,
once having felt the joy, having had "mind melds," and knowing there is so
much more to come, it is impossible to ever be "normal" again. I just wonder
what is to come and when I will dare to open this Pandora's box again.
Today. Wish me luck, fellows, as I go into my room and start to breathe, not
knowing what is ahead.
Looking for Light,
Mary Ellen
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 10:45:01 -0400 (EDT)
From: Katalin Jane Koda <kjkodaATnospamwam.umd.edu>
To: "Gordon J. Bakken" <bgb0163ATnospamrs195261.ks.boeing.com>
cc: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Pentecostal Kundalini
Message-ID: <Pine.SOL.3.95q.970929104422.18354A-100000ATnospamrac3.wam.umd.edu>
Content-Type: TEXT/PLAIN; charset=US-ASCII
Help Me get off this list---I do not have time to sort through this stuff
every DAY?????!!!!!!!!!!!
Date: Tue, 30 Sep 1997 00:15:47 -0000
From: David Tompkins <gurudaveATnospamsoback.kornet.nm.kr>
To: "'Kundalini list'" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Light dripping
Message-ID: <01BCCD36.51EFCF50ATnospamGURUDAVE>
Has anyone felt and seen light dripping down either side of their eyes. I've been watching this for several years now and still have no explanation. At first it was red, then there were other colors which I don't specifically remember, but orange like the sun when it's setting, blue I remember. Now it's bright white. At first I could feel it move down like the space was tight or something, but now I don't feel it so much. What could this be?
Peace and love,
The Ox.
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 23:45:22 -0000
From: David Tompkins <gurudaveATnospamsoback.kornet.nm.kr>
To: "'Kundalini list'" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: RE: drenched in sweat.
Message-ID: <01BCCD36.4F4DFB50ATnospamGURUDAVE>
Dear Nancy:
You wrote:
I have never really known if my experience was kundalini. I haven't had
some of the other strange physical side effects which dor and others
have described. I only had everything else in my life fall apart. (That
sure was fun!) But my health and body is doing great, better than ever.
The other quality I have noticed is that I am becoming stranger and
stranger. I don't fit in with society. I am not antisocial, but I
refuse to participate in activities which don't provide benefit for me
or others. (I've resigned from several community boards and committees
which fell into this category.) I do pull out a personality to relate
as is necessary. But at a core level, I do not conform. (Come to think
of it, nonconformity was always a latent quality of mine.)
Anyway, after this post, I am beginning to believe that maybe I did have
a kundalini awakening. It just was more gentle physically than most
people's. Does this make sense???
The Ox>
I relate very well to what you say. There are many times when people speak of severe physical symptoms that I too have questioned whether I have experienced kundalini. But I'm here like you. I'm familiar with the things discussed here because they are the space that I live in. I haven't experienced fire up the spine, a flaming sun in the brow, or certain knowledge of things past or present. What I have experienced is the kind of awakening that sends me off on a tangent from the desires of those around me. I was fortunate as a child to have a strong mother with an even stronger faith in God. We often lacked money for our food and rent, but I remember her taking my hand and together asking God to provide for our needs. That lesson stayed with me. Awakening I think is much like this, we participate in this experience of life both as divine awareness and supplication to the divine.
Many more knowledgable than myself might make the division between kundalini and awakening. I would be very interested in hearing their comments. In an earlier posting someone mentioned that this awakening is like a light switch: it's either on or off. I agree but, I don't recall that switch ever being flipped. On the other hand I remember another person who used to live in this physical body, whom I have to take responsibility for, but whom I can hardly remember and have absolutely no interest in doing so.
Yes, I do believe from an amateurs point of view that a gentle kundalini awakening is possible. Then again maybe I'm still at an early stage in the process. You know, sometimes I wonder why these great 'spiritual' things happen to other people, ie. channelling light beings, an open sixth chakra, healing ability, etc. Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing something wrong. I mean, I really do want to be stronger. But I also think I have to become aware and grateful for the gifts already present. I think this may be a struggle between the path I've chosen and my ego wanting to take it over.
Peace and love,
The Ox.
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 12:38:09 -0400
From: David Bozzi <david.bozziATnospamsnet.net>
To: Kundalini <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Dream
Message-ID: <342FD971.3EF8ATnospammail.snet.net>
Last night I dreamt I was in my room.
I suddenly began to sense an attribute of "buoyancy" in my body.
I walked over to the open second floor window.
Inhaled the fresh stimulating air.
I knew that I was dreaming.
I leaped out the window and floated up.
Past the power lines.
Higher than the trees.
As I began to drift higher I became fearful.
I told myself,"Just relax. Let go. Trust."
I drifted higher into the clouds.
Higher and higher... until?
There was a powerful message here for me.
Something I have heard many times.
But on an experiential level where it is so clearly manifested
is something different.
Fear keeps us grounded and stagnant.
But trust, the more we have the higher we go.
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 09:42:51
From: "Duncan, Mark" <duncanmATnospamemh22.eustis.army.mil> (by way of Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistressATnospamdomin8rex.com>)
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: RE: Trusting the "U"
Message-Id: <3.0.1.16.19970929094251.80e7b4aaATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Hello Nancy
Boy do I know what you mean. I really identify with your first two
paragraphs.
I am listening to a tape set, Energy Anatomy by Caroline Myss, Ph.D.
She describes this phenomenon as the first chakra is the Tribal chakra.
I wish I could explain it. The money spent on the tape set is well
worth it so far. I am on tape three of six. I believe the tape set
exists as a book.
I hope this lead is of some help. However, watch the K list for anyone
not agreeing with me. I am a newbie in this area.
P.S. I am desparately trying to catch up on my mail reading, sorry for
the delayed response. :-)
Love & Light
Mark C. Duncan
Network Engineer
Information Technology Solutions, Inc.
Building 2787, Ft. Eustis, VA
757.878.0071 ext. 297
duncanmATnospamemh22.eustis.army.mil
>-----Original Message-----
>From: Nancy [SMTP:NancyATnospammagiccity.com]
>Sent: Wednesday, September 17, 1997 4:40 PM
>To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
>Subject: Trusting the "U"
>
>Hi all,
>
>My life overturned this past year...business gone, marriage over, many
>relationships severed, letting go of possessions, other personal
>traumatic experiences.
>
>At first, I was shocked. I hated it. I swam against the current, trying
>to recreate my old life. The more I swam, the harder the current became.
>But I am a strong current. I thought I had beat the current. But as I
>started coasting to shore, I was pulled in life's undertow and died.
>
>[duncanm] < snip>
>Thanks, my k friends, for being there to let me share my enlightened
>moment.
>
>Namaste,
>Nancy
>
>
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 09:39:51
From: Ethan Fay <osmundvozATnospamrocketmail.com> (by way of Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistressATnospamdomin8rex.com>)
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Unidentified subject!
Message-Id: <3.0.1.16.19970929093951.0e3f613cATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Hi everyone,
I was wondering if anyone out there could tell me a little bit
about spirit guides. What are they, and what is their purpose? What
is their role in K awakening and how do they help in the path to
enlightenment. thanks, Ethan
_____
Sent by RocketMail. Get your free e-mail at http://www.rocketmail.com
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 09:31:54
From: valerian <madammumATnospamptialaska.net> (by way of Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistressATnospamdomin8rex.com>)
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: crossroad [redux]
Message-Id: <3.0.1.16.19970929093154.80e7da36ATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Jason S. White wrote:
>
> Why has this screaming power
> crushed the music of my dream?
> That beautiful, sad dream
> filled with forlorn and lonely life.
when are we crushed by our questions?
musical dreams live solitary streams,
independent of judgement suspicions,
& stymied by mental reflections.
> In this realisation I arrive at a crossroad, hot, dusty,
> dragging my torn body to a stop.
> The salt of sweat envelops my lips, tongue
> and the dry, raspy constriction of my throat.
arrive as a guest on a singular quest
and bring your self-image to rest.
the salt of the earth holds a light & a mirth
and the *nectar of gods* your bequest.
>
> The journey to this place, difficult but grand,
> stretches behind me like a familiar trodden carpet.
> But here, at this place, Now, there is little familiar.
> Now there is only a beckoning whisper of the past
> and the cool, fresh breeze of beauty.
we are what we are & *i yam what i yam*
and our memories of our past journeys
are illusions in mind when as treated in kind
and we never will get *too familiar*
no we pass through these lands unfamiliar...
>
> A step in any direction brings answers
> yet still deeper questions,
> glimpses of a legacy unraveling to a singular truth,
> awesome in its simplicity and complete indifference.
a mistaken answer from steps to discover
whence what & the wherefore of whimsy,
unveils a question which never would question
itself without stepping out flimsy.
>
> The road I feel to choose is to live
> through the beauty capable of this human form.
> With the sad dream crushed there is place for love
> in this weary traveled heart.
one *TRUTH* is a fancy of fantasy artists
and what one *perceives* is another,
beauty is relative, sad dreams are needed
and the journey is what is discovered.
>
> This embodied reflection at the crossroad
> goes now to teach without knowing,
> to love the full living, to live its small part
> in the balance of the equation of the singular truth.
the *spirit* is willing, but the *flesh* is weak?
lobster, who do you seek to teach what to?
v
--
"Ah, good taste! What a dreadful thing! Taste is the enemy of
creativeness." PabloPicasso
valerie cooper
http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/7982/index.html
Date: Mon, 29 Sep 1997 07:21:15 -1000
From: Ruth Trimble <trimbleATnospamhawaii.edu>
To: M <chooseagainATnospamthegrid.net>
cc: tg xxx <imtgATnospamjuno.com>, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: The Kundalini Perspective
Message-ID: <Pine.GSO.3.95q.970929064348.26459D-100000ATnospamuhunix4>
Content-Type: TEXT/PLAIN; charset=US-ASCII
Hi TG, M and List.
You ask:
> >Re: your comments about the depression or Dark Night of the Soul.
> > I agree it is gruesome. I remember being so depressed that I could not
> >lift my head off the pillow...all day..
> Ladies, I would like to know if this was all pre-K, a prelude to K, a stage
> of K, unrelated, much much before, etc. How do you interpret the dark night
> in relationship to K? This seems so important...I am not sure why. M
>
IT was after K. awakening for me...and where the shock of my ecstacies
drove my husband to leave and I was faced with dealing with all my
insecurities and fears totally without support. I had no framework for
believing in myself and my abilities having been raised to see myself (as
my mother had) as dependent. It was as if a persona had to die.. this
conditioned weak being that my environment had manufactured from the
moment of my birth. The REAL me...which I had been born as, had been so
thoroughly squashed and subordinated that it took a while for that to
emerge. But the scared, dependent, helpless, low self-esteem and guilty
Ruth died in those years of depression. Out of it came a very
independent, confident, trusting in spirit, free, sensual, ... and many
other positive aspects of the ME I was before birth. I am not sure how to
speed it up... I did the healingwith chanting.. and mantras and lots of
them all day long... it made the process tolerable. My friends remind me
of the person I was BEFORE K. awakened, and I can hardly believe it was
the same person.. I was a doormat and an abused wife. After K. I will
not go near abusiveness and disrespect. So these are my ways of figuring
out what was going on.
I see it almost as a kind of blanket that has to be turned over in the
psyche...always have. It is as if the negative ions are all facing the
wrong way and have to be turned... ha ha...perhaps a magnet could have
speeded up the process.
Ruth
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